International AIDS Candlelight Memorial 2026

The International AIDS Candlelight Memorial held at the Tararua Tramping Club in Mount Victoria, Wellington, on 17 May 2026, brought together community members, speakers, performers and HIV support organisations in an evening of remembrance, reflection, solidarity and aroha. The memorial honoured people who had died from HIV and AIDS, acknowledged people living with HIV today, and reaffirmed the ongoing importance of compassion, visibility, education and community care in New Zealand.

The gathering opened with Richard Tankersley and Tīwhanawhana. Richard reflected that the AIDS Candlelight Memorial has been held internationally for more than four decades, recalling early memorials in the 1980s and emphasising that the primary reason for gathering was to remember those lost over many years to HIV and AIDS.

MC Debbie Roche welcomed those present and introduced Dr Hetty Rodenburg, whose keynote address formed the emotional centre of the event. Hetty spoke about her long experience as a GP caring for people with HIV and AIDS during the 1980s and 1990s. She described being born in Holland before the Second World War, her father’s imprisonment by Nazi Germany, his return from Poland with advanced cancer, and the formative experience of watching him suffer without the palliative care or emotional support that would be expected today. As an eight-year-old, she made an inner promise to make a difference for people who were suffering.

Hetty traced her journey through medical training, anaesthesia and general practice, explaining how earlier medical education encouraged doctors to remain detached and “stay in the head” rather than open the heart. Her work with people facing cancer, neurological illness, trauma and later HIV and AIDS challenged that model. She remembered one of her first patients, Gary McGrath, a significant figure in the needle exchange programme, who became both a patient and a teacher. Through Gary and others, Hetty learned about HIV, injecting drug use, stigma, trust, vulnerability and the importance of listening.

She recalled caring for around 70 to 80 people with HIV and AIDS, including men, women and a child. Many faced not only physical illness but fear, stigma, ostracism, abandonment and a devastating lack of touch. Hetty said that in a society where ignorance created fear and fear created separation, the simple acts of holding someone, listening, offering a hug, or staying present became profoundly healing. She spoke of attending many funerals, offering eulogies, and witnessing extraordinary grief, courage and resilience. For her, the legacy of those who died included the transformation of HIV treatment in New Zealand, where HIV is now a manageable chronic condition for many people with access to medication.

Hetty also reflected on early HIV treatments such as AZT, remembering the excitement around its arrival as well as the harm caused by uncertainty about dosage and side effects. She told a moving story of a patient with advanced AIDS whose small daily rituals of coffee and cigarettes had been discouraged by a doctor. Hetty recognised that these rituals gave him meaning and stability, and used the example to stress that care is not only clinical but deeply human. Her central message was that love, acceptance, compassion and community are essential forms of healing. “Fear separates, love connects” captured the essence of her address.

Positive speaker Matt Sharpe then shared his own story of being diagnosed with HIV in Berlin in 2013 and deciding to return to Aotearoa to be closer to friends and family. Even with support around him, he felt isolated in his experience of being HIV positive. Contact with the Burnett Foundation Aotearoa, then known as the New Zealand AIDS Foundation, and counselling through the Āwhina Centre began his healing journey. Attending peer support groups, including gatherings linked with Body Positive gave him connection, consistency and belonging.

Matt connected the memorial with the upcoming 40th anniversary of the Homosexual Law Reform Act 1986, noting how communities came together then to fight for dignity, equality and human rights. He acknowledged local figures such as Bill Logan and Fran Wilde, and spoke about the power of showing up for one another across generations. His involvement with peer support, the Candlelight Memorial, the World AIDS Day Parliamentary Breakfast and the Positive Speakers Bureau allowed him to turn personal experience into education, advocacy and connection. He encouraged everyone to repeat the phrase “Let us not forget,” making remembrance a shared act.

Music was woven through the event, including waiata from Tīwhanawhana and a performance of Carry The Light by The Glamaphones. Debbie Roche led the candle-lighting section, inviting people to quietly reflect on those they carried with them. She acknowledged those lost to HIV and AIDS, people living with HIV today, families, friends, carers, volunteers, advocates and organisations including the Burnett Foundation, Body Positive and Positive Women Inc. She reminded the gathering that while medical advances have transformed HIV, stigma, unequal access to healthcare and isolation remain.

The memorial closed with Richard Tankersley and Tīwhanawhana.

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Debbie Roche Hetty Rodenburg Matt Sharpe Richard Tankersley The Glamaphones Tīwhanawhana

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