Search Browse Media On This Day Map Quotations Timeline Artificial Intelligence Research Free Datasets Remembered About Contact
☶ Go up a page

Snapshot 2000 - Matthew(February 2000)

In this podcast Matthew talks about coming out and first sexual experience.

Audio and Text Download mp3 Download HQ mp3Plain Text (for Gen AI)


The podcast titled "Snapshot 2000 - Matthew," recorded on February 15, 2000 in Sydney, Australia, encapsulates the personal journey of an individual named Matthew as they navigated their sexual identity during the decade of the 1970s. The 15-minute recording is centered around the theme of self-discovery, the realization of sexual attraction, and the struggles associated with coming out.

The speaker recounts an early awareness of their same-sex attraction around the age of 12. Initially, there seemed to be a bisexual phase, but as time progressed, attraction towards women diminished and a stronger inclination towards men became apparent. Despite maintaining platonic friendships with women and appreciating their beauty, the individual recognized a distinct lack of sexual attraction in contrast to the feelings harbored towards men.

Growing up in an environment with little acceptance for LGBTQ+ individuals, there was a palpable pressure to conceal and suppress one's sexual identity, exacerbated by homophobia within the family and community. Despite being involved in the arts, which often brought them in proximity to gay individuals, there was no experience of conversion or molestation that Matthew's parents had feared.

The individual delayed coming out, and it wasn't until the age of 20, when they moved to Brisbane for university, that they began to seriously consider finding a romantic partner and forming an emotional bond rather than simply satisfying sexual urges. This led to Matthew's first sexual experience at the age of 21, in the context of a loving relationship that had grown from a long-term friendship. It's emphasized that the relationship and emotional intimacy were more significantly formative and treasured than the act of sex itself.

The process of coming out was not smooth. Initially, only the speaker's partner and a close friend were informed. The friend struggled with the revelation, possibly due to having previously perceived Matthew as heterosexual based on misleading comments made about women, which were aimed at maintaining a straight facade. Challenges with family were also noted; while Matthew's parents suspected the truth, they never directly confronted it after an initial probing that was deflected. The tension between implicit knowledge and explicit acknowledgment within the family dynamic is highlighted.

The account provides insights into the considerations and planning involved in coming out, emphasizing the importance of doing so when one is ready and has a support network in place. It reflects on the potential consequences and stresses the need for a safe environment, recommending patience and careful contemplation for those facing similar circumstances.

In summary, Matthew's story is one of self-acceptance, the search for meaningful connection, the complexities of revealing one's true identity in an unsupportive milieu, and the value of timing and support in the journey of coming out.

This summary is created using Generative AI. Although it is based on the recording's transcription, it may contain errors or omissions. Click here to learn more about how this summary was created.

Record date:15th February 2000
Interviewer:Gareth Watkins
Location:Sydney, Australia
View on Map
Archive:The master recording is archived at the Alexander Turnbull Library (OHDL-004114).