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Crystal and Harriet - South

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[00:00:00] This podcast is brought to you by pride in Gareth support from the rule foundation [00:00:08] I like saying queer more than anything else but I don't like using it in reference to my sexuality or anything [00:00:18] I guess in the queer saying out kind of call myself queer, but in the end the end just the day to day life, I'd call myself a lesbian because I feel like it's easier and it's more relevant to like what I'm doing now and it saves like questions or like, having to explain yourself or kind of justify yourself when sometimes just cut me [00:00:39] screaming. [00:00:41] Just like whatever I want it. Like it means that I can just it means that I can just do it for a while I don't feel like Broxton. Like it means that I like being amazed that I can just like whoever I want, and I don't feel books. [00:00:56] And why don't you crystal like to put kind of labels on them? [00:01:00] Not to be like, [00:01:03] as disrespectful to people that are really as a huge part of it. Do I feel like it's not a part of my identity that I need to express verbally? If they may see it? Right? [00:01:21] I don't know. [00:01:23] Also, I think for me, I guess I kind of don't really say I'm a lesbian. I say I'm married. And then I just mentioned that I have a female partner, I guess people in the straight community usually mean that. They just assume that means I'm a lesbian, because because I was crystal What do that? And then if I say Oh, my ex boyfriend had a boyfriend was like, Yeah, sometimes they could have just come down everyone. [00:01:51] When did you become aware? No. [00:01:58] I suppose strictly when I was 21. But I don't I never know either to cut like, I suppose before that I kind of thought I was a sexual or something for a long time and [00:02:12] then cleared and a bit lighter. But I don't know if that part of this or not. Yeah. [00:02:24] But in like 16, maybe? [00:02:28] What kind of made you like, aware of that. And you know, like what you were thinking about? [00:02:33] I don't know, I was reading a lot about Stephen Fry. [00:02:38] And I became a little bit of a seat with him. And I just thought he was so great. And I was like, that is so cool that he can be you know, this game in his 60s or something but be celibate with his partner and, and not have that. [00:02:58] kind of [00:03:01] know what but just I felt such a cool idea that that you can acknowledge how you feel about things but not have to. I don't know. I just think Stephen fries really CO and I want they don't record. [00:03:16] Okay, tell us who Stephen fries in case people don't know. [00:03:20] He's this really cool, British dude, who [00:03:25] is a bit queer. And he's in like, some cool movies. And he hosts the show called QI, which is like my favorite TV show. And he's just like a genius. Pretty much. Just like a really smart co all around, dude. [00:03:40] What did you say was a comedian? [00:03:42] He is a comedian, too. [00:03:44] So do you think he was like an important kind of role? [00:03:46] Yeah, he was here. [00:03:52] I just think he's great. Did you? [00:03:57] Did you have to kind of come out? Do you think people still have to do that? Did you see? [00:04:05] I told I told my mom straight up that Mom, I'm gay. And she's like, Okay. I feel I feel like like I told her and quite explicitly and stuff, but she maybe didn't understand all the sort of connotations of that or anything. But I also didn't feel like I had to elaborate on what if anything would change? Because gates, so sometimes she says things that are but okay. So like, I came up to her, and she told my dad and like my sisters. No, but I haven't. I just don't really feel compelled to tell people straight up and generally, like, they're important when there are no hair anyway. So [00:05:00] move on for me. [00:05:03] How about you? Where did you come up with? [00:05:07] Um, I guess, I guess I kind of, I guess I like in school. I feel like I just know that I had crushes on girls, but I didn't really think it was like, a big deal, jail, or something that was like anything I thought was just like something that happened. I feel like I guess I didn't realize our crushes at the time. But now I kind of look like oh, yeah, they totally were, then cuz. Cuz I read this book, that seed. Everyone has a crush on a girl doesn't mean you're listening. And they'll say, okay, but actually, I feel kind of annoyed that book. What is it should say, even has a crush on a girl doesn't really mean but some people. I feel like they would have been like a handy extra sentence. Because I feel like it was like, kind of confusing. And what was the other question about bit coming out of, um, I guess, I guess I was like, kind of like thinking about stuff my head and I kind of, I kind of put us dating me and I kind of felt like it was kind of like a cliche, or like, I was trying to be someone that I wasn't to come out or sales Kairos I was trying to to will and so I kind of just didn't until I had a girlfriend his name was like, pretty obvious. Steve brown because I had a girlfriend. So again, I just like, figured it out. But I do feel like, like, now, I feel like I like I mean, I don't like that I have to but I don't like coming out to people just say just like correcting, you know, people say oh, I say all my partner about why they say what does he do? And I think she and I feel kind of like annoyed that they that they would like make those assumptions. And I feel like I want to add myself so that more people will realize that they shouldn't make assumptions about [00:06:56] like her normative assumptions about people. [00:06:58] So both of you kind of came out after high school. We're kind of figuring stuff out more in but what do you think? Do you think your high school experiences kind of played apart at all? Or do you think maybe if things have been different, you would have come out earlier or [00:07:14] I feel like the first goal I went to my friends High School was extremely conservative. And I know that another girl in my class, I don't know if she came out, but she made out with some other girls in the locker room. And everyone was like, it was like a pretty negative reaction like you fancy like pretty horrible things. And I kind of I didn't think it was horrible. But I guess I kind of kind of joined in like, I was kind of like, oh, like, oh, why would you do that? Okay, but I feel kind of like bad about it now. But at the time, I just kind of felt like, I don't know, why would you kiss someone at school just seemed like a weird like today. But then in my then I changed High School. And it was like, I met some queer people like queer teenagers. And that was pretty cool. And I just was like, finally, I kind of [00:08:13] had a boyfriend so Okay, great. Whatever. [00:08:21] was the question again? If [00:08:23] Do you think it will kind of high school experiences kind of have affected this? Especially because you didn't come out until you're older? Do you think of things have been different? or What was your high school environment kind of like? [00:08:37] Um, [00:08:43] I feel like I didn't even [00:08:47] know anything about [00:08:52] or anything that wasn't like a really negative kind of media stereotypical portrayal of [00:09:00] gay or queer at the time. They [00:09:08] I just because I like I remember the year after I leave school, there was like this big thing. And when I came back for the summit, all these kids were like, oh, did you hear so and so and all these kids came out and stuff when they leave one year? [00:09:22] at uni, and all this stuff? And I remember thinking, [00:09:26] Okay, CO, but, like, [00:09:31] I think possibly it It wasn't an environment that people could come in and at the time, but then the wigs started the year after I left. I think there's What is it? Why me? I [00:09:44] don't know. an acronym for [00:09:48] lady. well know, [00:09:50] why me? A lot of guys and straight. Yeah. And yeah. [00:09:59] It started with least I don't know. [00:10:02] But um, [00:10:04] I just, I feel like now I'm a little bit angry. It just the educational system in terms of like, like, you know, you do health study at school or something, and they don't acknowledge anything along those lines. I feel like if maybe I'd I don't know, head knowledge of it. Or if someone had explained it, really [00:10:30] just a clickable way [00:10:31] it would work. DM remember anything kind of in the health curriculum, either view about sexual orientation or gender identity. [00:10:41] I remember learning lots of stuff about [00:10:45] straight six, but I don't remember learning anything about sexuality at all. I don't even remember it being mentioned. [00:10:57] at all, actually. [00:11:01] But I do know that now my school [00:11:05] I was surprised that schools at home are [00:11:11] Wellington based, youth school age support, network, go do a talk at my old high school, which is good, really good, and also was surprising for you. But going back to the awkward and I think if I had been in my second high school the whole time, I might have come out early to kind of realize what kind of been a different space than in my super conservative, private little girls high school because there just wasn't as a supportive environment. Also, I'd heard that some girls had been because it used to be a boarding house and some girls had been expelled for for like a long time ago, but I'd still heard it expelled for lesbian activity, like one girl gave the Gilligan so I just got expelled from the schools as well. Okay. Must be like you really? I cannot like good, good thing to there. And I didn't want to get expelled and really not that I really wanted to give anyone else a message. But saving if I had I probably would have not [00:12:19] scary. Do you remember anything in classes? [00:12:23] Not beyond the weird kid putting a condom on a seed? [00:12:31] There's nothing. [00:12:35] So what do you guys think of the most kind of important issues that are facing queer and trans young people in New Zealand today? [00:12:42] I think lack of information and lack of [00:12:47] support from people I mean, like, say, your straight parents might teach you the things that they know that maybe they don't know, they might see this. That's kind of I mean, who's at the school if your school isn't kid, just a lack of information and support? [00:13:03] Yeah, I agree with that. Like I agree. Definitely if the lack of information because I feel like if it was just, you know, if it was just kind of a segment in your health clock, you you would not be the toolbag and the playground who uses fag to describe the difference. Like, yeah. [00:13:26] Guy is not an acronym for shitty. [00:13:30] There's a Fall Out Boy song, so it's applicable to young kids. [00:13:34] Do you guys hear that a lot? Still? Or did you while you're at school people using that's a gamer? To me, stupid or? Yeah. [00:13:42] And even I see that. And I feel like I kind of, like at 17 I was like, hold on. That's not okay. And I kind of had to train myself out of saying it because it was just something that was didn't, I didn't even think about it at all. Like I didn't really, I didn't think about it. And normally, now I don't really here, but occasionally, I do hear it when I'm kind of in a different place like not in my work or not with my normal friends. And I feel really shocked and kind of cross and I try to pull people up on it. But some people, sometimes people just are still quite oblivious, and they don't really, they seem like kind of taken aback or just kind of surprise or kind of confused about what I've kind of just said to them. But I do kind of make a point of trying to pull people off or just kind of being like, it was kind of leading the conversation or just being kind of annoyed that that people would still you know, say something so silly. [00:14:35] I do remember kids saying is go. [00:14:39] I don't know if I ever picked it up as a thing. I feel like I remember trying to use it once and then feeling so guilty about it. And then I never use it again. But I used to be like no, one of those like, No, I'm not gonna swear because I like having a vocabulary and, and stuff like that. So maybe it was just tired of data? I don't know. But I feel like it's definitely a lot more of a deal with, like, my sister's year who was below me because she's still like, it's just ingrained. And the way she talks about anything that is she just drops it all the time. And [00:15:21] um, what do you guys like issues facing currently anti semitism and will be and like 10 2050 years time, like didn't know be will be the same kind of thing, do you think we'll have kind of evolved quite a lot. I feel [00:15:34] like [00:15:36] ideally, that we will have evolved a lot and I think that will be good. And I feel like even though it's kind of like a small Stephen is still lots to do in the community. I think the marriage of quality passing in New Zealand kind of helps get some kind of visibility of the queer community and kind of like, acceptance and kind of like a mainstream way that everyone can kind of say, and it was like a big deal. It was really loud like in Parliament and you know, people, lots of people talking about it, and lots of people had opinions about it. So I feel like it's kind of like a small stepping stone that could kind of lead to other things. [00:16:18] Well, I can think of is like like and teen 50 years I'm gonna you're going to be going to funerals of like grandparents or something that are strange, because they don't understand this right now. And it'll be a weirdly tragic but heavy time watching them slowly die out. [00:16:38] You mean? [00:16:41] Goodness. [00:16:46] I'm not talking about your grandma. She's already [00:16:55] does is kind of community and kind of belonging to the kind of rainbow community important to you guys. [00:17:03] Not especially. [00:17:06] No, I don't think so. Oh, well, kind of not. Not really. I feel like I'm I just kind of happened to be in this community. And that's who my friends so that's where I am. That's how I like if I feel like, I'll be happy to be in any community. But that's it. I do kind of like to, to, to go to like queer events and stuff because I feel like, I feel safer. Like if, like, if I'm holding hands with crystal on the street or something. Sometimes I feel like worried that someone's gonna, like approach me or say something not very nice to me. So I feel like sometimes I do like being in the queer community because it can be like a safer space, but I feel like it's not. Not there. I mean, if it was, if I felt safe, he really will be. He'll be I'll be fine to not like exclusively only the power of the vision really Hello. [00:18:00] Won't be out for the last question now. Then I kind of do [00:18:06] all the toilet. So we're unisex [00:18:10] and then wait, and then it kind of doesn't know, what was supposed to be what's going to be an issue. I [00:18:17] know, you said what's it gonna look like? [00:18:19] And and like, mums and young children won't ask you if you're a little cooler. [00:18:26] And think that you can't read. [00:18:28] And also people will say firefighter for goodness sake. [00:18:34] Police Officer officer stayed off policemen and firemen. And also people won't say when you're crossing the road the little lights thing lights up. He wants a look out for the green man. He will say look out for the green person. [00:18:54] I'm sorry guys, part of any groups and the queer community or a part of kind of, like sports or arts or kind of other activities outside of that. community. I do [00:19:07] Do for road DVDs that can kind of queer [00:19:14] us a little bit [00:19:16] maybe sports? sports. [00:19:20] sports teams. Yeah. [00:19:24] And you're in the Cake. Cake. Why? [00:19:27] What's the big game client? [00:19:30] It's, it's not actually call it it's just what I like to call it. [00:19:36] Quiet Quiet with a cue [00:19:39] for Korea. [00:19:42] It's just queers. People singing. [00:19:48] singing, singing. [00:19:50] Did you like to join the [00:19:53] choir over? Kind of [00:19:55] non? [00:19:58] Not especially just [00:20:02] just came up in my Facebook feed. [00:20:05] All right. Someone can teach me how to sing? Do we have to explain what Facebook is? And the inherit will stop telling me I suck? [00:20:15] Yes, but what what is Facebook? How do you think Facebook and Tumblr? Social media kind of plays a part in the way that Yeah, and the way that we connect and build a community? [00:20:29] Yes, which is kind of crazy. And [00:20:32] I feel like it's a really positive platform. And also really negative can be negative as well, because it's kind of good. It's easy to make connections and kind of say people and be connected with events and make events and have people that like, see the events, I'm kind of trying to think I don't even remember how you found out about stuff. Facebook. Actually, that sounds silly, but is [00:20:59] true. Now. [00:21:02] And but sometimes I feel like it can be negative because I feel like sometimes within minorities, people can be quite critical, a little harsh of each other. And I feel like the internet or social media kind of gives people kind of like a faceless kind of opportunity to kind of say things that they may not say in person, I think people can get really hurt by that. And and even stuff like not just within the within the minority itself. But just like stuff like cyber bullying people being made on the internet saying things that they wouldn't normally say through things like social media like Facebook Cool. Well tablet like saying hurtful things to people that they they may they may not in real. And [00:21:47] I feel like I'm only Well, I suppose I only really remember shortly, kind of negative things based on like, [00:21:59] like Harry said it, it just gives people a faceless kind of opportunity to [00:22:05] I don't know, attack each other, or something. And, and it I think it [00:22:15] make this is something that is kind of not really thing, but it makes people very prone to sort of try it out jog in each other with the acronyms or something can mean. I don't know, you just you sort of read it and get it but let's do it. Oh, gosh, I don't know what that means. I'm not clear enough anymore. [00:22:39] Yeah, I feel like there's a lot of terminology. Sometimes people like oh, [00:22:46] I kind of feel like maybe like guilty, like, I should know, how can you ask me? Like, how can [00:22:53] you create even creating even Why don't even know that? Because I feel like once you know something, you know? Well, I know that I don't even know that. So Facebook's a good opportunity for people to like, use language that I might not know that I use, it's an opportunity to learn. [00:23:12] Sometimes a lot of it's just a bit over the top in terms of like how many different acronyms? Do you have the same thing because people do it a different way. It was just like, [00:23:25] Okay. [00:23:28] What do you think about the way queer and trans people are portrayed in the media, currently, by kind of thinking like, maybe, you know, like, local, like story, like people we know and New Zealand, like maybe politicians or famous people who are kind of queer, but also thinking about like TV programs like Glee or like, know, what events [00:23:50] are in the media. [00:23:52] I feel like this the visibility issue, so we're not there, but when we are [00:24:00] sometimes it can be quite [00:24:04] negative, or we can be queer people can be portrayed as [00:24:12] says, and bullied and troubled, quite in quite negative kind of this. I feel like I always want to watch a queer movie or like a movie about to woman like a romantic movie about to a woman that's not about them being queer like that. It's about like, like a, like a straight romantic comedy where there's like some other kind of drama, which has nothing to do with like, just something that's not about being like coming out to the family or feeling sad, or like turning straight, or just just a movie that's like just about something just nice. Like, it's like a nice, I don't know, just a different kind of romantic comedy for lesbians. It's not about [00:24:52] just it's not about being at least. [00:24:57] I think often trans people have made a mockery all in the media, and all portrayed as really. [00:25:05] Like, especially, like, [00:25:09] male to female trans people are portrayed as, like really sick show, and really like, yeah, just really like, that's like a focus of the personality or the Imodium portrayal in the media [00:25:29] will just kind of grow just kind of missed. Its kind of mistaken. It's kind of badly portrayed, kind of, [00:25:37] like, they kind of had no idea what they're talking about. And it's kind of like a big joke. And if you kind of pull people out by feel like, Oh, it's just just TV, it was just, you know, hokey, is this a thing? It's like, Well, actually, I don't care because that's how people, you know, youth will, you know, that's what people saying media is really powerful. And if they see all these negative issues, negative images or negative ideas about people that's gonna fit. [00:26:03] I agree with that. Like, when there is made up a trial, it's very, oh, it's always being romantic comedy, or whatever. The deal, isn't it? [00:26:17] It's just annoying, annoying, kind of [00:26:22] thinking of like, glee. And like, [00:26:27] I feel like there's there's always this kind of, like, if, if a straight actor or actress is playing a gay character, when they're doing interviews as themselves, they're very, very quick to point out, oh, I'm different from this and stuff. And then they try and make it like, like, I'm highlighting this because I think it's good for the world to see that Australia, they can play a gay character and, and that there's probably different positive aspects to that. But I also people don't go around asking and Hathaway he always plays straight people saying, well, maybe she's bad guy, and I've missed it. But don't always go around, ask her if she's straight, playing straight all the time. Like, what do you need to distance yourself from it? Especially if you're trying to Ghana, that kind of audience as your, you know, [00:27:24] platform or something? I don't know. But that's a little bit annoying. [00:27:31] But, and then they get famous because gay kids and, and Quakers and everyone, not just like the beast fans, Eva. So that becomes a big thing. But then it's still like, [00:27:45] they don't want to be associated. [00:27:50] Do you guys watch specific things in the media or specific things? Because is queer characters to kind of see that identity reflected? Oh, [00:27:59] yes, definitely. I yeah, I do believe it. I really do. Glee, I think like is a good example. Because I feel like, I mean, some of the things I've done a bit crap. Well, there's lots of great characters and lots of relatable, maybe potentially relatable characters. And it's like, a high school drama about lots of things. It's like fun musical is so popular and neighbor loves in these lots of queer characters just check on and the light hates all time. And I think that's pretty good. Actually. [00:28:28] Do you think things like Glee have kind of changed the way that queer people are perceived? Or like, do you think they've made a difference? [00:28:36] Actually, it's I know, I can't really describe how but I think they, they, they, they, they make it visible. And they kind of they kind of touch on issues that Tino to the youth or teenagers might have the kind of like relatable, fun characters. [00:29:00] Yeah, I think so. [00:29:03] Glee really annoys me. Like, I like Blake and I like that they're queer things, but I have big issues with it, especially in terms of lesbian portrayal because it's like, like they makes me so angry sometimes. Like, they take so much Kia with a gay male character and trying to make that like this potent kind of life changing thing but when it's like queer young gills one of them's a bitch and the other was an idiot. And they supposed to find of a nice way to find some kind of you know, nice thing and the relationship but also not really understand it and it's not expanded upon and it's like no one kid to make them characters it was just a kind of gimmick to bring in the female gay crowd or something like that. Like [00:29:59] this this show because with Kurt, they talked about his relationship with his father and about his father's lack of knowledge of of KCX and and then what the lady didn't even know they didn't even in Brittany was so [00:30:14] pretty like not even a character she's just like a gimmick. She's like the to say stupid things about ducks and cats and get Santana off. Sucks. It really sucks. And I mean, there's also that thing where it's like, are we ever gonna say a boyish or? I think maybe androgynous is the wrong word. But like a boyish female gay character on a show that popular or something? Like [00:30:43] I feel like they could totally pull it off [00:30:45] Glee probably could but they won't. And if they do, it'll be bad. Maybe they will be so bad. I don't I feel like no. [00:30:54] Okay, I thought they would I thought the real Glee the real favorite school it's a [00:31:01] Glee Glee [00:31:04] whatever they want is [00:31:05] when they get the real people to audition to be on the TV show. [00:31:08] Yeah, I thought my my Glee Project [00:31:11] because I kind of like kind of [00:31:14] bring them into addition though, but they decided halfway through not not quite what we're looking for there. Danny is it Danny? Yeah. Okay, and apparently like the actress that played what's your face Rachel head on here anyway or something while she was there? [00:31:30] I know. [00:31:32] Like they're not you know, they they think they've sort of painted the to the female population as much as they need to and that's about it now. [00:31:45] Yeah, I agree with you but I still probably [00:31:50] totally agree with you that I just do like I guess that's because all so so so I just [00:31:57] I really like skins [00:32:00] love normally hates it. Yeah. [00:32:05] What about you [00:32:07] know, it was just I think I think skins really well skins it looks like like a TV show. Like it it's like a British base kind of young teen thing all about the Rotate idea. But it's a little bit you know, kind of hyper hot and stuff and just all the sex and drugs and stuff. That doesn't really happen but they make it look really nice anyway. But I'm so i think i think what skins did really well was they they like, like the portrayal of knowing Emily it wasn't about him being gay. It was just like a really kind of cute relationship. You sure? Yeah. I'm pretty sure because I thought well, even if it was about them being gay or whatever they like the word sex that works bed and fall like you had to live out Emily's really screwed up relationship with her sister a twin sister stuff and like her mom was a wink. And you know what? The end like? No, his mom was just lovely and weird. Call it my mom. And like, I don't know the friends were like, cool, but kind of told that same time and friends are generally like that. [00:33:32] Do you think Yeah, how do you think it's different than to play like the character right next up [00:33:38] so different just different countries are British Isles was more kind of like gritty than America. America is more kind of shiny. American TV shows are kind of more shiny and happy and I don't know. I feel I can British TV shows this is just kind of more gritty and real a little bit darker or something? Yeah, [00:34:00] what do you think men cry makes you cry [00:34:07] about just like British American like the difference between Glee and skins? Yeah, how you feel? [00:34:13] Because he talked about how Yeah, [00:34:15] I suppose like just want to see like skins kind of caught them as people not characters or stereotypes to get an audience. And I mean, like I knew I actually finished watching the end of the third generation but like that whole kind of Frankie is a character that was such a cool character to and it's like she wasn't just some gimmick to bring in crowds even Oh, maybe she changed her I don't know. But like new aspects of just like being a cool person they're not just a this is a gay character and you're gonna have to be happy with it because it's all you getting kids [00:35:01] hey [00:35:05] I just felt like was just when I meet crystal she was just really in love with those characters Michael It was so great and and then I watched an Oscar like the kind of horrible to each other out to kind of horrible to each other. And the only cute time is when they hold hands through the door is it seemed like the ultimate saying and probably like the best thing ever. But apart from the I feel like the quiet main to each other and [00:35:27] kind of [00:35:29] if we had to write lay and skins against each other and it was careful it was Brittany and Santana. [00:35:39] Like even what's it like Britney and Santana first kiss at a Valentine's thing there was a Whiskas even by the way, really fucking open looking. [00:35:49] But Jays just wins. [00:35:54] I agree. [00:35:56] So how about you guys? Kind of pacing me looking forward to you? Are you interested in things like marriage and children? [00:36:07] Yes, we [00:36:09] he's, I feel like I'm, I feel like, yes, I do want to have children. I'm going to have children. And I feel like, I feel like this. They should be it'll be good to have more support for queer people wanting to start families. So just kind of I don't this I don't really know where to go to find support or informational. yet. there yet, term? Yeah, I don't know about that. And also, I feel like now there's, like, I don't really believe in marriage, because it seems funny, but I feel like now, of course, I'm like, think it's great that there is marriage equality. But I feel like I would get married. And it could kind of help me, like, legally, legally like it, especially in terms of like, if I had if we had a child, it would help us it would help the child for us to be married. I think I feel like it might be a thing. Because I guess like, yeah, I think it would just help it would I think it would just give some kind of legal standing. [00:37:22] So there's good [00:37:26] stuff like adoption. [00:37:28] Is it legal? I think there's maybe a little bit on the way on the way. [00:37:36] I'm really interested in adoption. [00:37:42] What do you mean? [00:37:46] I do I like I want to adopt kids because I don't know. I [00:37:51] apparently you said it's like a thing that a lot of maybe, like queer people in general, seem to hedge upon the aspect of of procreating as a kind of, like [00:38:07] what do you call it like narcissistic or something kind of a do? Or, you [00:38:14] know, like, like having kids, you should come across like a few people that had had the same kind of idea as me or whatever. I feel like, like not not to call people, you know, decks for wanting to have kids or something, but, but I feel like Personally, I wouldn't want to have children. Because I just feel like it's [00:38:39] I can't think of the word. [00:38:41] I feel like this toe. I feel like it would be really difficult. So adopt a child I feel like in New Zealand they're not like tons and tons of children to adopt and I find that that kind of maybe I don't know kind of strange and kind of like kind of like him was it like an accessory to adopt a child from a different country I feel like there's something just not quite right about and I just from my knowledge there's not a huge amount of children that need adopting or get adopted New Zealand because lots of children and New Zealand get adopted within like a family kind of cuz that's how that yeah like fun I like mommy culture so you so you would so it's not that common and also I know that you can also discriminate against I know that you can was burned donation you can discriminate against adopting to a gay family and I feel like that would be really horrible and like really heartbreaking if you're really wanting a child and I guess I just selfishly really want to give birth because I want to have the experience. So I I hope there's like more support for people who who want to have babies that are [00:40:07] do you guys want to stay in New Zealand? Live? Here? Have [00:40:13] you want to go? somewhere? I'm not gonna be poor for the rest of my life. [00:40:20] jobs do you guys do now? What are the things that you want to do? What are you studying? [00:40:27] I am an early childhood teacher. And I love my job. And I would ideally like to race in New Zealand because it is [00:40:37] what [00:40:43] I because I guess that's where I'm from. And I feel like it's a nice country. And I feel [00:40:50] like this is where my family's This is where I probably I feel like it's an important part of me that want to share with my children [00:41:06] aunty Nicholas, an engineer, and I'm studying business now, but hopefully I get into New Zealand drama school next year to do yeah, entertainment technology course. And I want to at this point in time, because it's probably gonna change I want to stop here. I want to run down for like Broadway, or musical theatre or like wasting kind of adieu and there's not a lot of work going and sound engineering and New Zealand anyway so which is why I'm poor. [00:41:46] But as I said a few like say you want to be in different catchy for like your job. [00:41:52] prospects that do you think New Zealand is an ideal place to raise the top? [00:41:59] Bill? Well, like? [00:42:02] Yeah, there. You know, we never imagined raising kids as I imagined doing it. I kept my parents house or something and having widow fields for them to run through and Vidya [00:42:17] treehouses, but like [00:42:21] me that had to learn how to drive [00:42:25] in the middle of nowhere. But like, I also I also I want to raise, like, will have kids or raise kids overseas, because I want them to be international citizens. And then, you know, and not, there's this mindset of growing up in New Zealand was so far removed from everything that we just don't click into the way things I ever else ever again. And like, if you could raise a kid somewhere like Europe, we could go, how many different places in a day or something? That would be wicked. And then thank you passport, and come back here when they want to and need to go swimming at 286, I'm saying. And yet, but I suppose ideally, I'd want to like, go work on progress, like for a couple of years, and then probably come back. [00:43:26] Here enough. [00:43:29] And you guys have any kind of final things you'd like to say, share with the people will be listening to this in the future. Anything you think's important to say about waiting? [00:43:42] I feel like this. There's some positive things happening. But I feel like we there's like a long way to go for queer people to feel completely safe and visible and recognized. And except that and without having to make it big. saying about it all the time. [00:44:08] Yeah, like, [00:44:10] like, I'm kind of looking forward to that. Maybe it's kind of sad, because people tend to like, like queer parades and parties and things. I'm looking forward to a day when it's not, like necessary. Yeah, necessary, or sort of the focus, I suppose. Because you only generally get media coverage when you're wearing a dry headdress and walking down the road, on a giant shoe or whatever. [00:44:43] But what was my point in game [00:44:50] time when [00:44:53] you say I'm also looking forward to a time when Fred Phelps and his whole family around? Thank you. Media coverage, felt as a plus a douche bag on here. Fox is a giant douche bag. He lives in the States. And he runs this website called god hates fags. And him and his whole family. Run this church of people that go and protest really random funerals about why god hates fags and things? I don't know. But basically, they just be haters and they don't hate. And I'm looking forward to a time when they are not around. Slash they are not getting media coverage that could be given to the quick kid wearing a heat rich. [00:45:47] Good way to [00:45:49] just to end on a positive note. What's your favorite thing about being a Korean person? Today? Oh, [00:46:07] I like being in it. I actually like I like I feel but special. And I like being in. [00:46:14] I like I just, I just like, myself, I guess. [00:46:23] I just I feel like I like I like being in a sometimes there's Nicholas by like, being in a minority group of people. And I feel like, you know, I kind of have a different perspective and like, learn, like know, lots of really cool people, lots of cool people in the community. And I appreciate lots of different perspectives. And I think being clear kind of helps it helps them to be kind of open minds and have different ideas about stuff. [00:46:53] Yeah, if you're writing a dry show would be really cool. [00:47:04] That'd be great. But mostly I like I like the [00:47:13] sound really kind of frivolous, I guess. But I like that. The fact that I had really weird style and and scope and was kind of cut and stuff kind of translate quite quickly is quite CO [00:47:29] and so who can we like bed badly fitting pants. [00:47:38] I kind of agree with that. Like, I feel like every time you go to a queer event, I feel like you can kind of you can kind of dress how you want and it's kind of I feel like people always often other people kind of worried that they have to wear some things have wear high heeled shoes with us. And all be fancy or weird. So you have to address this thing and I feel like in the creation really it's more free and you feel like more able to be yourself. Yeah, kind of and people are kind of more [00:48:09] accepting of different things and it's nice [00:48:13] and like and the queer community I like it when [00:48:18] we let you go to things in and [00:48:25] I don't know just like quick is have such good style [00:48:28] and good here [00:48:31] yeah and good here and just [00:48:35] describe some of the things that are good styling good here. [00:48:40] Oh no, there's lots of it. Like there was a cuckold here and I PZ things and like Swedish tattoos. And like when girls have tattoos of those like oh, kind of pent up Gil things we see some lady with things but unlike this a skill that works around the corner from my school and she's all like she must working on business during this time. She's sweet a suit and you're like tailored so well. I'm just like damn have good style. Why can we be friends? So like co here. Ah, she had the coolest like burgundy suit thing the other day. And it shouldn't work but it does. He's like damn good.

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