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Self care tactics for mental health - Shift hui (2018)

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[00:00:00] This podcast is brought to you in association with inside out [00:00:03] in pride in [00:00:07] Hi, everyone, my name is Alex, I'm going to be facilitating this panel discussion on tactics for self care. [00:00:17] And as we know, this movie is the theme of this movie is wellness. So this is really, hopefully helpful helpful for all of you to hear a little bit about what our panelists have to say, on this topic, [00:00:33] as it's a pretty big reality that a lot of people in our community base mental health issues. And so and it's not always easy to [00:00:45] know how to take care of ourselves and our bodies and our minds, it's easy to forget that we have body sometimes it isn't a quick dummy to help. But on the other hand, there are some really helpful things some practical things that we can [00:01:03] teach ourselves and learn and share within that community about what what we do find helpful in those times of crises or when we're feeling stressed or anxious or really low. So that would just start off by introducing ourselves. If you want to share a little bit about your, your journey, feel free to do so. Maybe something about self care, self care means to you. And I just want to acknowledge that we're all like at very different stages within our experiences and mental health and and we will will feel different things at different points and things come and go. So I just want to acknowledge that [00:01:42] you have to [00:01:44] shut it that's our [00:01:45] managers, Kyra? [00:01:53] Are they and I was diagnosed with depression and a few other things like five years ago. [00:02:00] Yeah. [00:02:02] Kota Kota. My name is Kate I use they didn't pronounce. And science Kyra plus anxiety this association [00:02:12] independent mania, [00:02:16] Richard, the Emperor nouns. I've had moderate to chronic back pain and headaches since I was about 1112 years old. And so in self care, mentally is very important to me, because I already have a lot of the physical pain going on. So it's just about minute. So I'm very focused on managing self care because of picking mental emotional well, because my physical is on well as the top. [00:02:42] Coat [00:02:42] everyone, my name is data, I use data and pronouns. [00:02:47] Just a snippet of my approach to mental health. I do live with chronic pain from an injury over a decade ago. And one of the ways that I have worked with that physical pain and also mental pain, living in the patriarchy is through meditation. So I'll probably talk a bit about that. [00:03:10] Hi, guys, I'm Jay is they then pronouns? [00:03:14] I haven't officially been diagnosed with anything. But I've really struggled with my mental health in general, with like, depressive feelings and anxious feelings, since I was probably 13 or 14. [00:03:29] Yeah, and I've sort of had a very like, up and down journey with it, and got some cool tips. [00:03:39] Hi, Linda. [00:03:41] He can pronounce from nail probably just be kind of like, for instance, in the relationship ending, but then also like the starting from as well, and kind of life, South Carolina that is just just doing what it is. For you to be happy can that's kind of [00:04:03] awesome. [00:04:04] Thank you, everyone. So I thought that we could just each of us, we could talk about something that we find really helpful for me to help them self care. So maybe talking about one or two specific things that you have found really helpful to you and then explain, yeah, how it's benefited you, and you will need to help. Anyone can start, we don't have to go on to kill all that. [00:04:30] Well, I find this self care. The additional definition of the word is really being self aware and acting accordingly. Which is you can say off crap, I only got four hours sleep last night. Okay, what are you going to do about it? So self care is then going, I'm going to make sure I get an early night sleep tonight and try and catch up. So that's like, number one, understand the word is is really, you know, acknowledge what might be wrong, and also see how you can try and fix it. [00:04:58] So the [00:05:01] power line being proactive, [00:05:03] proactive, well, yeah, because that also feels good as well. You can wake up the next morning and go, Yeah, I did try and get more sleep tonight. [00:05:11] And that's sometimes hard to do when you're in that state of Yeah, when you are feeling down, it's hard to pick yourself up and those situations, but maybe having some reminder, external reminder that that's important. Yeah. [00:05:26] I find that one of the things that I've recently realized is really important in terms of self care and mental health, but also being in a community of young people, but also a critical, we're [00:05:38] lots of different complicated simultaneously to have issues exist at once in one person, but then multiple people as well. And so when you have that many people potentially struggling all at once, it can become really important to have boundaries, because like, I kind of think of it as like, you can't fail out of sinking ship with the bucket with holes. And sometimes that sort of can feel like when you and the majority of your friends are depressed or anxious or suicidal, and it's really overwhelming and you're trying to pick someone else up while you're not really that okay of self. And so I think it can make it really important that you kind of laying out to people where your energy is that where your capacities and what your limits are in terms of like, [00:06:23] if [00:06:25] you're kind of like, Okay, I'm out of my depth on this one. And I think you need to, like, find someone else or someone with more experience when we're cities to take this on, because it's too much for me. And it's okay to do that. Even if it is your friends and like you want to help them but also there's a limit to what you can give away you can muster up as well as like that, like you may be not yet in the best position to be doing it. [00:06:51] And so it's like, it's definitely like a healthier Prince thing. But it's also like, if helping your friends is actually getting you took quite a bit of a slow burn out in let's say, Father, so [00:07:04] and so on the other side, don't self care is and dumping all your problems on to your friends, asking Hey, can I don't my problems on to you? [00:07:13] Sounds like life, saying I'm self care and your self care and self care together? [00:07:20] Okay, do you want to? [00:07:21] Yeah, I mean, I was going to pretty much say really solid to pirate about kind of learning something I've been thinking about a lot. That is kind of saying no, when people come to ask them for help, because I think especially I think with communities and friendship, like we lean on each other a lot with some quite heavy stuff. And sometimes it's kind of based to say, hey, like, I totally hear what you're feeling right now. And I sympathize and empathize. But like, I'm not in a space right now where I can help you with us. How about you talk to this person, or have a new data data, like an old chicken with you in the morning? And it's just kind of separating yourself, like just kind of keeping yourself safe and supporting others? And I think I mean, I think that goes both ways as well. Like, if you're asking someone to for support, like shipping and like, Is this an A like a Yuko? If I have a little we have talked about this thing? Like it's now an okay, time? [00:08:20] Yeah, to piggyback off what you're saying, okay, you know, consent, I think is often looked at in a very, almost like binary way. Is it like, Is it a, you know, can can this certain thing happened in this certain contexts, often it's thought about in terms of sex and sexuality, but consent is applicable in every aspect of every relationship from my perspective. And when it comes to mental health, when I do make the choice to check in with the people around me, or, you know, if I'm able to say, Hey, friend, you know, are you available to talk to me about this thing, it gives them context to be able to honor themselves and to honor our relationship. I think one of the edges of what we're skirting around right now is that if I love you that I'm going to give everything and be available constantly. And that a relationship is based on these absolutes of I'm constantly available for to meet all of your needs. And that's just not sustainable. I've found at all. The other thing that I would add to self care in terms of like, lifelong goals, is the Act and the practice of befriending oneself. And that is something that, you know, because we're all changing beings, and because the world is constantly putting things in our way that bring up discomfort, there is there's no arrival of I fully branded myself, myself, I fully done the work as I've experienced it. But it's the act of building that into one's day, the act of making that a part of one's life where I'm going to bring in that self reflection, I'm going to bring, I'm going to nurture myself awareness so that I can when hopefully in a positive relationship, someone asked me if I'm available, I can, I can actually love them and honor that relationship by saying I can't, because I love you. And I love myself. And this is what this this is how to nurture this relationship. This is how to make it sustainable. [00:10:20] Kind of like adding on to that as well as kind of finding the echo bands, dissuading like the people, you may as well. So yes, you can be like down sometimes and use other people can be down, but like, just kind of finding that balance between the two and just kind of making it seem like a work in order to be happy as well. [00:10:40] Yeah. Yeah. Some really good points. So it's very good. [00:10:46] Yeah, I think like, as others have said, being nice yourself is really, really important. Even if like, you just start saying nice things about yourself in your head that you don't believe you would be really surprised how much of a difference that makes sensitive, like, if you make a mistake thinking, Oh, god, I'm such like such an idiot. Like, I've heard everything, you know, like, very quickly, you can spiral down that rabbit hole. Sometimes if you see that, like sought to happen, you can be like, [00:11:13] No, actually, like, [00:11:15] no, like, I'm not. I'm gonna try and think the nice thing about myself, even if you don't believe it over time, you start thinking in a more kind, why about yourself. And also, like, we just one thing that I find really helpful and like my own personal self care is being [00:11:33] nice. [00:11:35] Which I know like, it takes a while to be able to get to that stage where you can like sort of plan things in advance. But for me, like in little sips, what that looks like is making checklists and breaking down big, like difficult tasks and to lots of small, manageable ones and sort of like, maybe being like, Okay, today I'm going to do this small thing, and feel a sense of accomplishment in doing that. Because even though it might feel like a lot on the say, or sitting aside some time to do like an hour a day to do like admin reply to all those emails, I don't want to but need to be shooting into volunteers. So [00:12:12] yeah, or it might be like having a diary. And just like writing down when you've got commitments so that you don't feel taken by surprise when they actually arrive. Just little things to make your life a bit easier, but will manageable in the long run, I find really helpful. [00:12:30] I think an important one is is love yourself. But tough love is always a little helpful to like you might not really want to eat those vegetables. Why united Good for you, I like it just a basic example. But it's the same of you might feel depressed or something and you you stay inside a lot. And that's fine to do for say a little while to kind of help account, recoup yourself. But there is a point where maybe it's a good idea just to see one thing, just to see one friend, just say hi, or just or just make them to come over and say hi to you. But yeah, and and and it's totally fine to just tiptoe your way out back into social life. But it's important to get that tough love of just just do it, just go do it. [00:13:09] You need it, you need to say hi to someone you need a good laugh, has some jobs and some fancy united, tough love is important as important as long [00:13:17] as we can. [00:13:19] There's something really poignant about what you just brought up, Richard, a few of us were chatting over lunch about the importance of like, you folks know what I thought what I mean, when I mentioned your inner voice, like they are that you've maybe here an inner voice that there's there's there's something inside of I'll speak for myself. [00:13:39] I have you know, [00:13:42] let's see, why don't we start with this. First of all, like, patriarchy and colonialism have, I think disenfranchise and put a lot of pressure around neuro diversity in the room. So for those of you that, like do hear multiple voices and ended like have identify with that, I want to make sure that what I say is not at all on the edges of shaming you only that if as in my personal growth in life, the more that I have listened to myself, the more time that I have spent self reflecting, the more that I can hear like, you might think of them like the little the devil on your shoulder versus the angel, like who you're going to listen to, the more than I look like look into those and do the personal work of being on the mental health journey, the more that I realized it's actually quite a few there's there's a multiplicity of attitudes and perspectives that if I listened in, I can hear and something that was brought up over the table is the the nurturing and loving inner parent, [00:14:38] or parents, and you know, it's like, you know, tough love is it is black and white, could be like, Oh, you have to do this and you have to debt. But sometimes an inner parent could be like, this is really important that you do this, and I'm going to sort of hold space for for that process. I know for myself, a big part of my mental health journey was grappling with my mother's substance abuse journey. And that being the child of an addict household brought a lot of barriers and things to work with, in, in growing up and growing into myself and developing that. So one of the biggest parts of my mental health journey in recovery is developing an inner loving parents that can say, what you know, not just like you have to do this this way. But someone that can can actually nurture myself, you know, in not having a perfect parent that met all of my needs throughout my entire life. Like I doubt many people in the world get to be able to have that voice be a part of the sort of Symphony that's happening inside me into the end to nurture that voice and to, to, you know, offer myself tools to to work with that. It's been a very healing experience. And if any of you have questions about that, I can talk to you more after the panel. [00:15:50] So if it's a it's a whole school holidays, and if you're hearing voices going to be a good a good night's sleep, you go not only to that's fine, you know, generally, but if it's an if it's a school night, you know, maybe in appearance, say I gotta go to bed early, you go to school tomorrow. Fine, fine. But [00:16:08] what I'm hearing [00:16:08] is that self care, it's, it is hard work. And it's probably one of the hardest things that we do, because that's why why is it that way. So [00:16:17] it is also much yeah, there's also much self criticism. [00:16:20] And that is that fine balance, you need to give yourself room and space. And you need to be easy and kind on yourself, show that self compassion that we always talk about. But at the same time, it does involve a little bit of even if you're not feeling like doing something kind to yourself. Even if you're not believing it, you just someone that just dropped the ball and and do it anyway. And you more than likely feel better afterwards. So just maybe in keeping that thought in the back of your head that I don't want to do it. As long as I know that. I know. I'll feel better [00:16:56] after it that you can see that the long term goal of feeling better off. Hi, Jenna to finally got that out [00:17:03] of a choice. [00:17:06] control but sometimes it does. [00:17:08] Yeah, certainly. I mean, it's maintenance. That is sure. So maintenance you have to do. You gotta brush your teeth, you got to ride your bike, you got to make sure you hit this plane. [00:17:19] It's maintenance is supposed to be boring. Not fun to do, but it's still important. [00:17:24] Yeah, I just wanted to comment on what you were saying about like self criticism. And I think, like, cuz I'm kind of all about, like, positive and negative words and associations. And I think sometimes like, rather than thinking about self criticism, like kind of thinking about it as self reflection. So Robert says like, yeah, rather than like you're critiquing the, I don't know, the stuff you're feeling or thinking or doing that's kind of like actually reflecting on it. So it's like, would be non judgmental, every just kind of assessing it for what it is and thinking like, Why do I feel this? Like, is that actually a real thing? I'm feeling like, why do I like kind of just like, go like looking at phones rather than like, but yeah, I kind of like feel it as like a looking out rather than like crushing and kind of thing. [00:18:12] I don't know if that makes sense. But a good perspective. [00:18:18] Just touching back on more like, positive practical things that we like to do. They do make meditation, or the other sort of tangible things that we can do. I say laughing with friends laughing with, with friends. And [00:18:32] so as a good, I find that one helps me the most, it doesn't matter how so my back is that day, if my friend makes me says it says a bad panel, something that's great. It makes me feel a lot better. [00:18:42] Right district? [00:18:43] Great. Yeah, [00:18:45] I think there's something to be said for structure and routine. I know for me what and the times where I've had the best mental health or the longest streaks of feeling positive, it's because I built in structure to my days, and how to have a way that, you know, I'm able to make sure that I'm getting enough sleep and that I'm eating three square meals, and that I'm attending to my life in ways that are that it's relevant. [00:19:08] And I find [00:19:09] that like, it can be good to have sort of a sort of imagined routine or to do list or like whatever, like a plan in place so that [00:19:19] it can be a really loose plan. Like, I don't use that term very specifically. But like, if you're starting to sort of downward spiral or have burnout or, for me, if I have like, post traumatic stress, Clara, then I kind of need to take the time to actually acknowledge them. This is a hard time. And then maybe when Normally, if I'm not struggling with this sort of thing, I will be doing more than just the basics, but like sometimes I I find that it's important to be like, Okay, well, this week's been really hard. And I'm just going to acknowledge that. So this week, I'm probably going to be a bit of a recluse, I'm going to do my basics, I might not a shower as much. And then once I'm work through that, I'm going to like, have more energy to kind of open up what I'm able to do. But like having that routine of like what do I do when I'm really struggling? What's the sort of bare minimum stuff that I can do? That will get me through and maybe I'm not having the best time, but I'm acknowledging that it's hard. And I'm going to, like spend that week just like, surviving it. You know what I mean? [00:20:16] Yeah, like kinda was that as I like, acknowledging what's your, like, feeling like for myself, like, and I like you guys like to plan thing. But on the other five, like, going outdoors, and just being like, away from everything, and just doing yourself like, I love going for walks by myself, or just maybe watching a movie about just getting away from everything. And just focusing on itself is kind of the best thing to do as well. Yeah, [00:20:49] yeah. And like, I'm going off with that as well. Like, you have to live with yourself, for either, so why. [00:21:00] So like, you might as well like, take, like, be nice to yourself and do nice things for yourself, like by yourself. For example, of like, summer, I was working full time, and was in a different city and missing my family and my partner and my friends. And I didn't really have a lot of times myself. So one day, I decided on a Friday to be like [00:21:24] I'm working on [00:21:27] and just decided to like, do it really nice day of things that I enjoyed. So I like went on a big long bike ride. That was like an hour and a half and then came back and had an F in the sun had a shower, took myself out to face and like to go to a dog up just like hanging out in a restaurant alone, and voices and drink wine. And then I went home and like baked and Coast enough for the people I was living with. And that was like, honestly, such a nice and beautiful day. And I had such a good time just hanging out by myself. And usually, like I think a lot of people wouldn't really think of doing things like that for them, like just enjoying time and your company and like doing things that you enjoy that you might not otherwise do. And I think like in terms of short term mental health, like that's quite valuable, as well as just like, treat yourself. [00:22:15] Yeah, but not not [00:22:17] in existence. [00:22:19] As a tree, [00:22:20] a tree, you need to have money for it. [00:22:22] So [00:22:25] like, we're saying, like, it's part of your routine, just eating healthy food and getting good night's sleep and throw into your routine as well like socializing with friends on the weekend. And just or even just scheduling time for yourself. But yeah, the routines and rituals are good one. [00:22:42] One other thing too, about the process of I love what you shared about taking yourself out retreats is, you know, when I when I have those thoughts that keep of of my head, there's a couple things that I do the ones that are that are just like, Oh, I can't think this sometimes I will literally just sing them away. But like Lola, [00:22:59] no, no. One of the reasons that I do that, and that I've developed that practice is because you know, I really want to be a good friend to myself and like it was said here's even though the cell the ego, right is is growing and adapting and changing all the time, I really do want to do right by my life force, and by the opportunity that I have here and like being a human being in this world alive right now. And that means you know, compassion in from my Buddhist perspective, you know, compassion is and all beings are entitled to compassion. And that does include myself. And you know, when when those thoughts come up is like when I say this to a friend of mine, would I take what I looked at them in the face and say the things that I think to myself in my dark hours, like no way and if I can treat myself like I caught myself just the other day, I'm like, wow, I am really a person who is trying to learn right now. I know it can really be like with that much kind of practice to switch it and be like I you know to have again that compassion and rootedness like, I am doing a hard thing. Good job me keep going. I love you right to have that be the central narrative of my life is like it takes three patterning. And you can do it. [00:24:13] Again, it is not a selfish thing to do. But yourself. [00:24:18] So true. Yeah, being selfish is more taking advantage of others for your own gang. [00:24:24] Yeah, that's, that's selfish. Self Care is [00:24:27] taking advantage of yourself for your own. [00:24:35] A lot of a lot of the time we hear the word resilience come up and, and self care and getting through getting through life in general. I was wondering whether you think that the term like the concept of resilient so like grit and getting, you know, picking yourself back up your full full over with you think that's a helpful thing, when you think there are other ways that we can sort of think about self care and, and looking after ourselves and tons and tons of women not feeling great? Yeah, [00:25:14] yeah. And we were talking about this this morning, because my high school was very, like, all about emotional resilience, some, like getting through the hard times to passing CA, [00:25:27] the focus, and like, I think [00:25:30] it's really like, until right now, I didn't actually like swap around it. But this morning, I'm saying to Alex, like, Oh, you know, I don't really like the idea of resilience. It's like, you know, pushing your feelings to the side of a bob, I'm just thinking now that actually, like, the times where I let myself be set, and I let myself have symptoms, and I let myself feel what I'm actually feeling, I think that is a form of resilience, because like, That, to me being resilient against the illness is actually given myself time to be Oh, and have like, you know, like, not push it down. Because by pushing it down, it's, it's not actually leading edge of space debris and kind of need that they want to work for. [00:26:15] Resilience can certainly be necessary components sometimes, like, if you're supporting a family, if you might need to be resilient and just get through that workweek, like it sometimes, you know, there are extreme situations. But otherwise, [00:26:32] in terms of like me to help [00:26:34] in terms of mental health generally [00:26:37] just took somebody I think [00:26:39] the word resilience to me doesn't necessarily mean being, like your ability to coat in the moment, I think. Like, [00:26:47] what resilience means is being It is like, recognizing that you're having a hard time, like Katie was saying, and like giving yourself time to like experience, but, and, like, get rid of slowly. And that might mean like taking time off of school, or like, just deciding that you're not going to reply to those emails right now. Or like, just doing any number of things. And I think, um, [00:27:15] I think it's not like because some, some people might think that, like, Oh, it's how fast you can recover from this thing. But I don't think it's necessarily that I think it's just the process of recovering and it's like, looks different for Iran, and it takes different amounts of time. [00:27:30] Yeah, and I think, I definitely think like, it's an important component of self care, but not in the way that a lot of people think. [00:27:38] Because I could, I could have been resilient and put up with the boys on my skill set, I wanted to kick them in the nuts. So I get them in the last line [00:27:48] of defense. Resilience is sometimes you can go now I'm not gonna put up with that. For me, like was the land is kind of is. Yeah, it's like trying to get back into faith. But like, for me, when I go through things, like, it's not going to take a minute to do things like so I just focus on myself, like, even if you have to shout out your friends for quite a while. But today, like just kind of allow yourself to get back up at your own pace. They're like Russia, there's nobody in telling me to get over things. It's just gonna, I'm not gonna you're not listening. [00:28:26] And [00:28:26] I think this strengthen like confronting how you're feeling and like, not unlike a negative way. But like in recognizing how you're feeling and putting the tiger on the table and having yell at it. [00:28:36] Yeah, and just like, recognizing, like, this is how I feel. And this is like, what it's going to take for me to like, not feel like this anymore. Feel better? [00:28:49] Yeah, it's acknowledging, I don't feel that right, and then gone, oh, watch a movie. [00:28:55] Watch comedy. [00:28:57] It's acting as well as knowledge and which is only think the important part. [00:29:03] I feel like sometimes the way that I've heard talks about and instead of mainstream mental health, kind of put it all that surround, Junko and and because ads and stuff, where it sort of feels like resilience is being treated as if it's a substitute for systems that are oppressing people will not actually make changes. And like, [00:29:24] I think we all probably are on the same page that like, I don't know that 70 and patriarchy, and transphobia. And all those sorts of things shouldn't exist, they shouldn't be institutionalized into our them into healthcare system and our system. And so like, the idea that minorities or whatever word you want to use should take it upon themselves, to become so strong that they can deal with this amount of like deactivation and exclusion at an institutional, national and global level was just like ridiculous, and like, really unfair to like put that on to the people who are being oppressed by other systems, like, Oh, you can just edit the pipe for your when your doctors being transphobic, or whatever. And it's like, they shouldn't be doing that. And so I feel like, like, separate from this idea that you should take it all on board yourself, but like, cope with the conditions, I think it is important that you kind of have this ability to work through things and to persist and to survive. [00:30:24] But I don't think you should have to constantly be the one it like, as an individual, but as a community taking on board, this crap that's down to sort of thing. So I guess it's like, I kind of hate that word. And the way that it's used with that idea behind, this is your burden and societies not going to change for you. And I think that those systems should change. [00:30:48] I run a dilution of custom of co workers, or coming out to me, Oh, you're so brave, you're so great. When I came out of work. And I, I don't like being called brave, because I shouldn't have to be brave, right? Like, in this situation, that's not. [00:31:07] I [00:31:07] don't like being told great. But all my mom and my friends or call me, I'm like, No, no, you're not what you're looking at it from associate perspective. We're looking at it from the perspective like, [00:31:17] Can we just be a question is not just like with resilience of coping with life, or my father and stuff. But also this idea that resilience is like if you're resilient, then you can get back to work or then you can be in full time employment, right. And like, I just don't think that this for everyone or anyone. [00:31:39] I don't think it is economic system, like capitalism as a means I [00:31:47] don't like the way ACC works really trying to push people off of this supported payments or whatever. And state of being like, well, maybe this person needs to not work like that should be what's considered and some people with mental illnesses and chronic time zone like I don't think the bottom six pieces that they manage, like put up with all this suffering so that they can use it and some limit like I think it's quite coercive sometimes like to tough it out. And I don't think we should have to like, [00:32:14] yeah, yeah, religious bit in navigating, like more appropriate jobs. Yet, if someone's got a leg injury, well, you can give them a desk job, you know, like, [00:32:27] I'm sure they should be, they could be a way around that. [00:32:31] I'm not sure if I should be [00:32:34] contributing to society and [00:32:35] that, [00:32:36] I mean, yeah, I think contributing to society is an interesting like, even volunteer work and stuff like that. Yeah, can be meaningful. I think that a lot of people and I guess I'm speaking from mostly myself, but the way that work and certain education systems are structured is working, let's do so. stuff, licensing exams, or making meetings or doing projects or like these things actually don't work the individual they work for is the system what even system at [00:33:14] work is like, I mean, yes, it's a way to move society forward but like with hashtag socialism, you know, just Yeah, I don't know it just kind of fades into that how capitalists like you are with that as you're nervous like you exist exist to work and contribute to society rather than like contribute to your own well being. I think it's just like an interesting thing to kind of have to think about. [00:33:39] Yeah. [00:33:42] But okay, great. Yeah. So let's just wrap up I did want to leave some time just in case anyone that wanted to contribute some of the tactics that mental health and looking after themselves if you want to share anything or it is also have any questions, so yeah. [00:33:59] Sounds good budget and they'll just like a money budget [00:34:01] but also like a time have to look like if [00:34:03] your life is really busy stuff [00:34:07] that isn't really measuring the internet is making sure you can survive I will go a little bit of spare time. What's your advice on something that's not expensive and you can do treat yourself [00:34:18] Take really long bathroom breaks at work [00:34:24] your book [00:34:25] Daniel can [00:34:27] talk to your mom like do [00:34:28] it on your bosses time. [00:34:35] I think also just sleep Sleep is such a like underrated thing like like I find my like I definitely know for myself like my depression and anxiety so much lower when I've had like a solid eight or nine hours sleep and I think that is something we kind of pride ourselves on quite a bit and it makes a big difference. [00:34:54] Lack of sleep can convince the HTTP five HTTP from producing your brain which is the happiness chemical so I getting good sleep is very helpful towards depression. [00:35:06] I say opposite when you're depressed. [00:35:08] So it's a bit of a paradox. [00:35:11] I say have a dance dance you get turn on your favorite jam and just shake it out. That's what that's my go to chicken [00:35:21] and you took so long [00:35:23] just go to yet but [00:35:27] I just wanted to size [00:35:29] struggled with a cohort of lots of different kinds of power [00:35:34] and a stone the blessed over [00:35:39] that's really [00:35:41] going to stop here and also that's also ok and then we'll get started in this kind of flexibility [00:35:55] like it actually sometimes going to be that [00:35:57] premise off [00:35:58] here. [00:36:00] So [00:36:01] I think sometimes we don't [00:36:05] really making stuff comes on you [00:36:10] know, excuse me [00:36:11] It's all [00:36:12] your fault if you do a better job [00:36:16] with that thought you know this call who survived it all the time I'm going to keep trying [00:36:30] one thing that I've been doing so [00:36:34] I said [00:36:37] to me [00:36:40] to [00:36:46] kind of play that to do this but not [00:36:49] just like me to track of you [00:36:51] know [00:36:52] my how he was like [00:36:56] whether I whether I was listening to music for me [00:36:59] to frame wait outside which [00:37:04] is a peaceful [00:37:10] life [00:37:21] keep the interest wait [00:37:26] a [00:37:28] minute [00:37:30] but this is really [00:37:36] relevant to you soon. [00:37:38] topics and [00:37:39] a better but [00:37:42] hey I'm really noticing that because [00:37:46] I had to [00:37:51] do a [00:37:53] pretty bad so it's kind of like [00:37:56] a relationship like this really see what [00:38:03] without pressure without okay [00:38:06] yeah [00:38:09] well yeah one thing like that really works for me is is kind of being aware of the environment in a grateful since like we have running water that is so cool. Right? Yeah and I that is that is what that is generally might go to on my depression days is I'll go get a glass of water specifically to go This is awesome. And then and then I'll go to the bathroom and I'll go this is awesome just the fact that we have indoor plumbing and our and our hygiene it's just that is awesome and that's just that's that can get me through a depression day just a concept of indoor plumbing [00:38:48] get really [00:38:48] excited about joyless Pulitzer great for hygiene [00:38:54] we have quite a few hands up on just aware of the time and how many [00:39:00] tomorrow tomorrow okay [00:39:05] so when I work [00:39:07] with my second [00:39:10] invoice after that to see like what's real and what isn't and rational thinking [00:39:21] so she gave me which equals [00:39:26] when you first start you write it down [00:39:31] but like for instance So for example, if I go into that, you know people's that could have waited about evidence [00:39:45] the evidence against it's mostly on the phone and that's just my sincere tangible way they also they pay for themselves [00:40:01] last one personally within this thing I treat myself like I'm someone else I don't compare myself to other people don't go like Costello wouldn't still watching myself. [00:40:12] I kind of I think okay, if I were a someone else, how would I think again, I think what would I think with them and you guys are all really integrated people so you can probably do this and say [00:40:25] if you fell down the stairs after getting up and getting a certificate you [00:40:32] find yourself beating yourself up inside [00:40:35] but he saw cell phone number is not to getting that you would feel if you put it towards her and you say oh my gosh, four things, you know, you wouldn't be getting other thing Oh, by the people on the stairs. So I kind of reverse that thinking and kind of try and pick myself like I'll think of someone else to make them [00:40:51] famous for being on trading. trading. You'll help value and treating others. [00:40:56] Yeah, beer and friends Be your own parents. They I'm loving [00:41:08] and thanks everyone for listening and contributing.

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