[00:00:00] This podcast is brought to you by pride indeed. And rainbow you.
[00:00:06] Hello, how are you today? I'm good. That's good. Who are you?
[00:00:12] Okay, match. Please tell us a little bit about yourself.
[00:00:15] Okay. I like anime and fire spinner. So let's play with fire. It's quite cool games on my PlayStation, Xbox and stuff
[00:00:28] being a part of fire spinner does it make you a pyromaniac?
[00:00:33] Yes indeed. Fires fun and climate fires cool. Not stuff. Yeah, a little bit not not quite melting. Playing fire in general.
[00:00:44] good fun. So whatever enemy do you like?
[00:00:47] A lot. It's more kind of what I get out. And if I like it, I like it. I don't I don't
[00:00:55] fire pile so that then you put on fire car file. Thanks, you
[00:01:01] know
[00:01:05] look at us with disgust you know, not necessarily don't burn on my stuff. It's pretty like pretty things.
[00:01:16] This looks pretty you got the picture here in the corner there and the whole file fancy. What is all this stuff?
[00:01:22] and Victoria Francis posters. So it's
[00:01:27] it's quite creepy. A co author. Gosh.
[00:01:32] So what musical you're into
[00:01:35] music. I'm going to keep up so it wasn't a Korean music, including sigh, but it's not my favorite. But everyone knows who is
[00:01:46] viral. But it's more like Wonder Girls miss a guest innovation and shiny, shiny.
[00:01:57] Shiny grocery things.
[00:01:59] Not this big, little shiny in general. The glass was too messy for you.
[00:02:06] It's the heavy stuff arts and crafts.
[00:02:09] Good. No. Yes, it is. I know this more difficult stuff to deal with them.
[00:02:15] Okay, so you went to the Q si last week?
[00:02:20] No, I didn't know you didn't know.
[00:02:22] So when I say
[00:02:26] what is your
[00:02:26] 6am? Male?
[00:02:29] Yes. And when I say gender identity, do you know what that is?
[00:02:33] Because I added myself as a gay male.
[00:02:36] Yes, your sexuality is gay.
[00:02:40] Obviously, as you just said,
[00:02:42] cultural identity.
[00:02:44] And I'm kind of New Zealand. European.
[00:02:49] And how do you express yourself and a feminine masculine? Can?
[00:02:56] toy? I wouldn't say express myself. I'm listening. Clap film camp.
[00:03:01] Yeah. Your natural feminine way.
[00:03:04] Yeah. And it was all natural way is not always the best, but it's just who I am. So
[00:03:12] any occasionally occasionally turned into a black woman?
[00:03:16] I did not tell them.
[00:03:18] Oh, rested up.
[00:03:23] That's why I said
[00:03:26] yes.
[00:03:29] When did you realize that you were gay?
[00:03:32] Probably when I was
[00:03:36] open, I fully knew I was probably 16. And between 16 and 17.
[00:03:42] After a straight relationship, kinda lasted a year and then kind of broke up. And that whole year with her kind of opened myself up to the gay side because she was bisexual. And yeah, opened me up to kind of past
[00:04:00] stuff in my life.
[00:04:03] Did you ever have a moment when you were younger? We saw like a guy in class thinking.
[00:04:10] Right? That's
[00:04:11] not necessarily a guy in class. When I was about 13. I did have my best friend kind of come on to me.
[00:04:19] I did freak out. And we just the friendships on a whim little bit downhill from there. To the point where he just doesn't talk to me at all.
[00:04:31] Yeah.
[00:04:33] Well, not really. But he decided to add me on facebook a few weeks ago, and it was really, really weird. He's trying to connect with you again. I don't know I used to be if I walked past him, he would purposely turn the other way, just to kind of be that negative.
[00:04:52] So it was really weird that he came into my work, talk to me and edit be on Facebook.
[00:05:00] I think he added me on facebook when he was very, very, very drunk. So it's hard to tell us how purposely that was it was an Oh, shit moment. Like,
[00:05:10] I need to be drunk before I do this
[00:05:12] click possibly. And I think at the time he was looking for a ride home from me. And so he was trying to connect to anyone he could on Facebook to try and achieve that.
[00:05:24] So there could be some underlying issues there that wants to reconnect, but it's too far past and try to fix the friendship.
[00:05:35] Three identifies himself as a straight male, still.
[00:05:40] A very closeted gay there, which makes no sense.
[00:05:45] Not necessarily No, it's a no, I think he is probably bisexual is very kind of ladies man, I person as everyone knows them. They're annoying and play at all times. It's just
[00:06:05] so when did you come out of the closet?
[00:06:10] I didn't really have like a big coming out of the closet type thing. It's because I'm naturally feminine. People just kind of guessed it. When it wasn't a straight relationship. Most people were very surprised. That was before I realized I was gay. And then all of a sudden say bang actually I am gay. And in Francis that kind of was like okay. And that was it.
[00:06:33] So there wasn't really a coming out of the closet. It was just a I would float around the closet. I was never in it.
[00:06:42] You're like decoration Nicole. It looks
[00:06:45] like your fingernail was on the closet. But you didn't actually come out of
[00:06:51] my closet was quite
[00:06:54] styled for me. My room is quite me. It's random. got different aspects my life kind of that the whole Gothic at Anime. And DVDs. Yeah, likes some soft toys. Most of them didn't go back in the closet. And then I've got kind of f5 staff and
[00:07:16] big rainbow Lady Gaga flag.
[00:07:21] What? Yeah, my brother tries to give me shit about that. But you're like
[00:07:27] Lady Gaga, it's epic.
[00:07:31] Have you ever wear a meat dress?
[00:07:33] I bet you haven't. I haven't automate this and that what disgust me
[00:07:40] jerky? No, I'm not necessarily entirely I really miss you to that person. Anyway, so waitress is disgusting.
[00:07:48] She she's big Lady Gaga, big energy water meters.
[00:07:53] So she's vegan? She says
[00:07:55] she is
[00:07:56] I'm pretty sure she's not.
[00:07:58] She says on Ellen DeGeneres sessions,
[00:08:01] perhaps is in I don't know, just cut it last hopes of way. So probably
[00:08:06] that's probably from dancing on stage every single night?
[00:08:08] Not necessarily because to hear her passing in between songs. She's not the fittest person in the world.
[00:08:19] Coming out of the closet to
[00:08:23] your room to Lady Gaga. As you do
[00:08:26] as you do, who did you talk? If you good.
[00:08:31] This person I told was my ex.
[00:08:37] So she was the first person I told it was rocky from you know, on
[00:08:45] a path there was a few close friends like the norm tell a few friends that kind of spreads around. So is that one person that starts to tell the whole entire world your business and you kind of get annoyed with them. But I was coming here next year current issues when I was at school, so it wasn't hugely a big deal for me.
[00:09:05] It became the case of everything
[00:09:07] thinking I wasn't really the case celebrity I guess I was as black I don't fact was me kind of.
[00:09:15] I'm not I'm the new
[00:09:16] black. If you're gonna give me set no big deal. Like one check tried to cut in front of me in the line one time in as it bits move, and she was to slack under your game. So now you're fucking slapped in this book pastor? Because like, why should I let her sit? kinda get my way and she's the same time skank. So kiss.
[00:09:42] You get those around the world. A lot of high school.
[00:09:47] High School, I've met a lot of people working and stuff that is the same. I don't grab the high school stereotype of the stupid slot.
[00:10:00] So um, what was the main reaction that you gotten when you came out? Kind of like,
[00:10:06] Oh,
[00:10:07] shit. I was like, Okay, good. Here, smiley face.
[00:10:12] still be friends. Yeah, because as an actor, pattern student, everyone's quite crusey to the point where they don't give a shit about people. They're not judgmental, because they're quite open minded. Probably because they have their back at students look at and every perspective possible. So therefore,
[00:10:33] the is not normally judgmental people there.
[00:10:37] So it was quite cool.
[00:10:43] Other aspects, most people just worried worried about it. If they had a problem, they just didn't talk to me. And I was fine with that. One kind of brought it up to cause issues or
[00:10:56] anything, which is quite cold, because I know lots of people, I don't get that experience, they get the negative side of it, which is the abuse and the bullying. And luckily, I didn't get that side. But I'm always willing to help people who do get that side.
[00:11:15] So you had a support system.
[00:11:17] I guess I had a support system, it was mainly kind of SF based support system, but I had friends when I needed them.
[00:11:27] Which is always great to have like a best friend that you could just go talk to
[00:11:32] sit with and go for a walk or kind of in the middle of that class just woke up because that's what we did. Which was quite co simple.
[00:11:42] So you've had a few relationships?
[00:11:46] I yeah, I've had a few successful relationships. And I've had quite a lot of could have been relationships like that get kind of not Mia flings kind of short term and
[00:12:01] I've kind of got to the point where if that under a month, they weren't a proper relationship.
[00:12:07] Yeah, they were they were more of a fling or just to see how it would go. And if it works out, it works out and develops into relationship or what it's just
[00:12:17] it's not going to work out. So why bother worrying about it? kind of thing. But in some cases that sounds quite I can negative aspects and to just say whatever.
[00:12:28] But seriously, a month isn't that long. And if you're going to have a huge driver behind someone, what's the point? I believe it's better just to be kind of like friends and go Yeah, that didn't work out. So friends. Yeah. And I'm talking to
[00:12:47] all of my exes I haven't gotten to us, which is uncommon for most people to so obviously I didn't have really bad ending relationships. It was more this this isn't quite working out.
[00:13:00] First of all mutual contract.
[00:13:01] Yeah. doesn't quite work. Now. It's depressing. Okay, a week over at his friends again. Well, obviously there's some relationships that are like, quite choppy for a while. I can't like a fuck
[00:13:13] you.
[00:13:14] Yeah, there's been a few fuck us. But normally, it's like,
[00:13:19] after six months, it's like come across and catch up and look. Yeah, haha, that was so little flame thing.
[00:13:26] Yeah, I remember that time. Yeah. Laughing story coughing
[00:13:30] Yeah, totally. Um,
[00:13:34] yeah, I don't know what else to say. This religion.
[00:13:37] So how do you meet other people and the LGBT IQ community?
[00:13:43] So this see of so many people, but is indeed is it? Yeah.
[00:13:50] I don't actually meet people for today. I talked to people. It's, yeah, there's a lot of crepes online. It's, it's, I can normally quite people quite well. So I don't know, leave it off. Incidentally. I've just been talking for a while. I'm normally just chat to friends that I've been talking to online for ages but without meeting them. And there is Facebook have been kind of associated with a few kind of support scalars groups on my best.
[00:14:23] What the moment I've got like six or seven. It's crazy, cuz all the updates are slightly away. But I'm always here to help people, which is quite cool that I had privileges that other people don't. So I like to try and make sure people kind of have support. Because the
[00:14:43] other thing is we meet people that care. So Gabe Aaron pami, which is Yeah, it's more of a fringe thing. Everyone there is quite positive people. There's the Cassie bitchiness that you get her.
[00:15:00] Yeah, gay associations and all that, I'm sure is quite different than the way
[00:15:05] it's quite funny because I what I see of the game that gay bands specifically is that it looks like something that a gay bar would look like pre law reform.
[00:15:17] It was felt awful. So it was one of the I believe it is the first day about New Zealand. Dude, start off somewhere else. I have read the history of it, but I can't quite come across. It was open like in the 60s, 70s.
[00:15:33] Yeah, when it was still Yeah, illegal. That's why it's kind of in a dark creepy alley. But because it's last so long queue is a little bit like a family. And obviously it's dysfunctional family. But it works quite nicely and everyone is normally really really good terms with each other.
[00:15:54] I haven't come across any major drama there. Some people think there's lots of drama. I personally haven't hasn't affected middle.
[00:16:04] I guess.
[00:16:07] Everyone has different
[00:16:09] dramas generally like ex boyfriends.
[00:16:13] Ex Boyfriend sleeping with the wrong person. It's
[00:16:17] gossip in general ever heading for no reason.
[00:16:21] Because it's at a members club. Everyone is quite class and it's voluntary work and everything goes and there's not kind of creeps trying to get into people.
[00:16:34] I think they namesake while ago.
[00:16:38] Apparently was quite bad a few years ago, but it was before I started on your son. Yeah.
[00:16:44] So what is your definition of virginity?
[00:16:49] It's an odd one. I have been with the girls outside that sort of virginity. I yeah. It's one of those odd Christians there.
[00:17:03] Yeah, it's whatever you feel it would be. It's more of a personal thing. It is kind of an odd thing. It's something that's not really
[00:17:16] valued so much as it used to be. So therefore, the question isn't quite as valued as the audience to be as well. And it is, to me it's all based on the male female, and kind of the bond between them like the whole century of marriage will then go
[00:17:37] from every religion on Earth. So it's kinda that I guess a few
[00:17:45] were bisexual. Some people don't count as the same sex as virginity.
[00:17:54] Some people do if you're fully gay, probably think your first time would be losing your virginity. But kind of if you've been to both sides it's kinda which one would you count like the
[00:18:08] and not knowing what I who I was within a straight relationship? I would say yeah, that was sort of losing my virginity but then again this the whole opening to myself too much really am and it is the kind of gay side of it too which could be kind of like a second vividly but it could also be counted as that was your virginity as because that is the trigger
[00:18:35] so every experience or received any abuse or abusive behavior because of your sexuality or gender identity
[00:18:44] not
[00:18:46] that much. I am not not necessarily I have kind of magical verbal and physical abuse my younger brother but I believe that's more just him coming through his teenage years and despite the title cut like every teenage boys and at the age of 15 and throughout school I didn't really receive abuse is probably some verbal abuse it was I would take it and they would get abuse back so it didn't affect me I don't I don't believe it then it possibly did be to lead the down but it's my outlook is quite positive. So I don't believe it is.
[00:19:39] Work I
[00:19:42] haven't haven't received abuse anyway because of my sexuality. I don't get some customers and such because I work in retail they're just
[00:19:54] what it's it's different.
[00:19:58] If they don't like me, they don't have to talk to me the other people that can save them.
[00:20:02] Recently, I've gone through one of this I don't know if it's because of sexuality, or she just didn't get her ways so she just hiding on me. But yeah, that's that's that's how life is if it gets that way. People get taste for miss anything. Unless you're like the huge bully. But then again, you probably gotta be somebody else in your life. So at everyone gets up and national wise. And some of it is just uncalled for out of fear. Some of it's just
[00:20:36] something small and they take it too much.
[00:20:40] So yeah, I think Yeah. Credit Good, good life that way.
[00:20:48] Well, thank you for the interview. You're welcome.