The title of this recording is "Ellen - South". It is described as: Ellen talks about coming out and identifying as bisexual. It was recorded in Dunedin, Otago on the 9th May 2014. The duration of the recording is 21 minutes, but this may not reflect the actual length of the event. A list of correctly spelt content keywords and tags can be found at the end of this document. A brief description of the recording is: In this podcast Ellen talks about coming out and identifying as bisexual. The content in the recording covers the decades 2000s through to the 2010s. A brief summary of the recording is: In this poignant podcast, titled "Ellen - South" and recorded in Dunedin, Otago, the speaker shares a personal narrative of self-discovery and identity as it pertains to their bisexuality. The speaker discusses the complexities of coming to terms with their sexual orientation, including the internal and external factors that impacted their journey. Early in life, attraction to both sexes was apparent, yet the speaker did not claim the label of bisexual until later. Having grown up with a limited understanding of bisexuality as an option, the speaker initially did not find language to express or explore these attractions, instead experiencing them silently or dismissing them as part of commonplace behaviors at parties. It was not until moving from Australia to New Zealand that the speaker could embrace their identity more freely, suggesting that change in environment played a significant role in their coming-out journey. The speaker touches upon the shifting language surrounding sexual identity, noting personal growth in this context as well. Relationships with both men and women are mentioned, with significant emphasis on the notion that feelings toward women were both genuine and more than simply a societal fetishization commonly portrayed. It’s also revealed that this identity shift allowed for greater transparency and acceptance in the speaker's personal and professional circles. The conversation further delves into the challenges encountered, such as fetishization versus biphobia, and the societal pressure to conform to a binary understanding of sexual orientation. Despite these obstacles, there has been an increasing visibility, albeit stereotypical at times, of queer and trans identities in the media, which offers some comfort, though the speaker acknowledges the need for broader, more accurate representation. Furthermore, the narrative highlights the positive shift in societal attitudes following the Marriage Amendment Act (2012) in New Zealand, projecting a sense of envy towards this progressive move in contrast to the speaker's home country of Australia. The importance of institutional support for queer and trans people is alluded to, advocating for increased representation of these communities in various sectors to aid in normalizing and validating such identities. Looking towards the future, the speaker hopes for further representation and normalization to inspire and support the young queer and trans individuals. Words of encouragement are offered to those who might still be struggling with their bisexual identity, reinforcing the notion that self-acceptance and the pursuit of personal happiness are paramount. The recording concludes with an optimistic note on the freedom and joy of being a young queer bisexual person in a progressive country like New Zealand, emphasizing the liberating experience of being able to love openly. The speaker's appreciation is evident in the acknowledgment of New Zealand's welcoming and affirming atmosphere compared to other less accepting locales worldwide. The full transcription of the recording follows.  It includes timestamps every thirty seconds in the format [HH:MM:SS].  The transcription begins:  How would you describe your identity? Um, I would say bisexual. Yeah. What does that mean to you? I guess that means that, um the people who I've been attracted to, uh, their gender has never really been a thing. An issue, Um, and I'm, you know, interested in entering relationships and being with people from both sex. So I guess that's what it means [00:00:30] to me. Yeah. Do you think the language that we've used to talk about our identities has changed much over time? See, I think that I never really spoke about it very much, Um, when I was growing up, because I kind of I guess I sort of, um, never, never said, like, I am bisexual until this year, actually, um, [00:01:00] despite the fact that I'd had, you know, crushes on people and hooked up with people, like so I guess for me personally, like that language has changed a lot. But I don't think that I ever would have gone out and said that I was straight either. I just kind of didn't use the term. Yeah. Um, when did you first become aware that you are bisexual? Um, I think that the first time that I really knew, like solidly knew, uh, was when I was 16, [00:01:30] I was going out with my first boyfriend, and there was a girl who I'd see at parties and stuff, and we'd like, hook up and things. And it was all that kind of like, you know, girls hooking up at parties, like being a hot thing. But for me, it was something more than that. Um, but I remember, like, the first time I ever felt like it was something that I shouldn't do was then as well, because I remember it was at one party, and she was just like, Why do you keep looking at me? Why do you keep wanting [00:02:00] to do this? And I was just like, I don't know. So I so I kind of shut it down, Um, and then just over the years, like feelings for other women and stuff. But yeah, this year is the first, um, like, sort of relationship with a woman that I've ever had. So, yeah, um, So when you were younger, did you ever talk to people about it, or did you kind of, um after I think mostly [00:02:30] I was I don't know if I'd call it repressing it. I think that I'd say that I didn't I wasn't told that it was an option. I think that was the key. Um, you know, you grow up with the with these, like, you know, I I went out with with guys. Um, [00:03:00] that's not to say that I ever said these feelings that I have for girls are wrong, but I just potentially because I was shut down fairly early in in the piece. Um, I didn't explore them, and I guess because I'm a pretty mono like a serial monogamist, like, I absolutely go from relationship to relationship. And I had two long term relationships. One was five years and one was three years. And so in that time, [00:03:30] there was no, you know, I wasn't having sex outside of those relationships. So again, it wasn't something that I kind of could explore. Um And so I think that was one of the really cool things about moving to New Zealand from Australia is I kind of got out of that space where I just where that was my identity and I was able to be more, I guess myself Yeah. Um, since you wrote, have you kind of had a any kind of, like, coming out? [00:04:00] Or you said you started to like, Look at that label now on yourself as bisexual? Yeah. Yeah. Um, Well, yeah, I suppose, like I told my friends at home, um, with certain friends my parents know, I don't know if they know the kind of extent of it. Um, the my girlfriend actually works with me. So everyone at work knows, or [00:04:30] my flatmates know. So I guess in that way, it's a pretty transparent arrangement. Um, And if someone were to ask me today, like, what's your sexual orientation? I would definitely say bisexual. Whereas last year, I don't know. If I would have said I would have said, Oh, well, I've only ever been with guys. That would have been my answer, I think. Whereas now I can I Yeah. I identify as [00:05:00] that more now. Yeah. Um, have you experienced, um, any biphobia? Um I think that it it was never phobia, I guess again, Like thinking back to sort of my first bisexual experiences. It was much less a phobia, but more this sort of, um I guess feti fetishization. And along with that, [00:05:30] um, it kind of sapped you of your capacity to take it seriously. I think you know, when you hook up, when I you know when I'd hook up with a girl, it was like, Oh, yeah, you know, good. But it wasn't like this could lead to a relationship. That was never the assumption I think of anyone involved. Um, so I guess not bi phobia. I wouldn't say bi phobia, but, [00:06:00] um, a lack of appreciation of the kind of seriousness of it. Maybe. Yeah. Yeah. And I think that's really common. And there seems to be, like, a lot of, like stereotypes about what it means to be bisexual or yeah, like the the bisexuality isn't real. Yeah, but you just confused. Or if you had any things like that, um, just like this year. So Oh, like any sort of confusion about what it is now [00:06:30] or or like other people Kind of telling you that you don't know your self or I guess, also, bisexual people often get, um, while you're having a relationship with a woman. Oh, you must be gay while you're with a with a man you must be straight. Like, I guess, people reading you as that and not seeing your Yeah, and And the idea of it being a phase? Well, I don't know. I suppose I have even questioned that [00:07:00] this year. Um, whether in the future, I want to have more relationships with men, Period. Um, I don't I think that other people actually seem to be much less trying to put me in a box. Weird. Like, II. I kinda wanna know. Like, I wanna know if it's this thing or that thing and and what's gonna happen? Um, whereas [00:07:30] other people just be like, It's, like all good. Like you're happy. Um, but yeah, I don't think that there's been much of them being like you have to choose right now or or identify as a particular thing. Um, my folks were really great about it. I only told them over Skype, but, like, you know, that was again. Now it's just It's as though my girlfriend is a boyfriend. [00:08:00] Yeah, which is cool. What is it like being, um, like out, um, in que at Dunedin and at the university? I think it's good. I mean again, I, I haven't experienced very much negative. Um, talk like, you know, you'll get people saying stuff on the street and stuff sometimes, but it's usually been fairly mild. [00:08:30] Um, and I think that Dunedin like I feel safe here pretty much all the time. Um, the university again, I. I don't I don't know, Because again, I haven't really felt any prejudice, so I haven't felt the need to sort of seek, um, support in that way. Um, which I suppose [00:09:00] speaks for itself, Um, in that I don't feel different this year having a girlfriend. Whereas last year I had a boyfriend. I mean, I moved here last year, and, um, we me and my boyfriend from Australia, we did long distance for a while, and then that didn't work out. And I cannot notice any discernible difference in how people [00:09:30] have treated me knowing that I was in that relationship. Compared to this year when they know that I'm in a relationship with a woman. Yeah. Have you connected to any of the stuff that is going on? Is that something that's important to you to have that sense of community? Um, I think that, like again, it's always been something that's interested me. And that was such like a, um, a clue as well, [00:10:00] you know, back home in Australia, Like going to the the gay bar in my city and also, you know, talking to lesbian friends and stuff like that. I think that I was always more interested in that than just the average straight person would have been, Um and so that's been actually really cool. Like going to some of the, um, queer parties at toast and stuff. Um, but I'm the [00:10:30] only reason I kind of go along to those or know about them really is because of my girlfriend. So I go with her. Yeah, but, um, that's all been really good. How did you guys meet? We met at work. Um, so I reckon it was about, like, October I last year that we first started kind of, you know, vibing around the office. And, um, then [00:11:00] it was the work Christmas party. And we Yeah, um, got drunk and hooked up pretty standard. Um, and then, yeah, we we started properly, like dating, dating, like, exclusively dating. Um, at the start of february. Yeah. Um, how do you feel about the way queer and Trans people are represented in media. [00:11:30] Not good. I don't think Well, I suppose for me, one of the things that I've been feeling especially this year is that in the media it's like, not even visible or if it is visible, it's so stereotypical that if these are the role models that young people are identifying with [00:12:00] and learning, you know, these are the potential me in the future. You get an idea about who you can be from, you know, film, television, books, whatever. And, um, I I was just I swear it. It feels like, you know, you've been like you've been taking the Kool Aid and it's like, this is the way that the world is. And if you're not showing those other options, I think that it can be hard. [00:12:30] Well, it was hard for me to to actually come out and say, Oh, you can also be with women, Um, and so I I wish and I actually I think it is getting better now. I don't watch a lot of like current TV, but I try and, like I read a few like feminist blogs and stuff like that and there's it seems to be more of something, you know, say it shows like orange is the new black having an actual Trans woman on there? That's mean, [00:13:00] um and also, you know, some lesbian relationships and stuff like that. So I guess I would say that I think it's getting better. It probably still has, like, a heck of a way to go. But compared to what it was like, you know, growing up as a kid in the nineties two thousands, I reckon it's better. Yeah. Do you ever see, um, characters or storylines that you can, um, relate to or that reflect your identity? [00:13:30] I can't remember any really from when I was growing up, I guess when I was a teen, the only lesbian relationship that I can remember from like popular media was bloody Marissa on the OC, and that was much that was, I think, very much one of those fetish eyes to like, Look at her. She's kissing a girl sort of arrangements rather than her taking it seriously as a relationship. [00:14:00] Um, I guess now it would be orange is the new black, which is good. Good show, Um, but yeah, apart from that, I don't know. How do you feel about the quality bill that passed last year? Really good. Really good. Jealous of you guys? Um we had it in my home state in Australia for like, a week or something, and then got anyway, um, I think it's excellent, and [00:14:30] I don't know, I. I guess I wasn't out in New Zealand before, so I can't speak to the sort of different feeling that that brings, but it makes me very happy to see same sex couples being able to get married. And it opens up that future in such a such a big way. Because again, [00:15:00] like getting married is such an ingrained part of the culture that I grew up with. Like my parents are married. Most of the parents that I know are married. Um, now my peers are starting to get married, which is scary. Um, and it's not as though I'm I've ever been one of those wedding people. I don't really You know, I never planned my wedding much, but I think being able [00:15:30] to join in in that cultural institution is a human right and really cool that New Zealand is on the right side of history on that one. Um, what do you think are some of the most important issues still facing current transfer for New Zealand for for trans people? I think that it's I. I would say that I can identify more discrimination against trans people than gay people. [00:16:00] I don't know. I only know one trans man in New Zealand. So again, he's really my only in, um to that. But like he's faced a lot of, um, a lot of difficulty in transitioning. And, um, I suppose, because maybe it's harder for people to understand being transsexual [00:16:30] ver being gay. Um, or it's just not as, Or maybe it's because it's more visible. I'm not sure, Um, again, there's a part of me that feels like I can't speak to this question because I am like, I'm only recently out as bisexual and it's been a positive experience across the board. [00:17:00] Um I mean, I know back home some of my friends that came out really struggled with that in the social environment that I was in. Um, but yeah, I don't I don't know how to answer that any better. Sorry. It's all good Where do you, um, think or hope we might be In 10 years, I'd like to see just more [00:17:30] representation of queer and trans people in everyday life. I mean, in in politics, in business, in the university. And it not be something that's not spoken about because I think that it's really important for young people to have those people that they can identify with, um as having a lifestyle that they might want [00:18:00] to have. Um and yeah, I guess you guys already have marriage equality, which is like, a big step. I don't know. I don't know if that means, you know, that's obviously not, like, tick down next sort of a thing. Um, there's still gonna be discrimination. Um, but yeah, I guess just more people [00:18:30] owning it and providing those role models for other people to feel good and normal. Yeah. Um, if you could give a message to, um, again, bisexual girl who's kind of struggling to to come out or have that taken seriously, what would it be? Um, I don't wanna, uh, see for me. Honestly, I think I was moving away [00:19:00] from my hometown. I actually think that's what it was. like getting, but, uh, but again, you can find that freedom in the town where you grew up. Um, I guess it would just be to acknowledge that as a as a bisexual girl, the other option is awesome. Like, it's really cool being with [00:19:30] a woman. And, um, take your time, I think, in finding that out. Maybe, like it's you know, it's not a race. I'm I guess pretty pretty late in the game when it comes to, you know, starting all of this stuff off. Um, but at the same time, as much as there are certain differences in dating and being with a woman and being [00:20:00] with a man, it's also just so similar it is just the same, but they're just a different sex. And so I guess I'd say, just if you like, someone just go for it and hopefully they like you back. Yeah. Um, And to finish off, what's your favourite thing about being, um, a young, queer, bisexual person in New Zealand? [00:20:30] Um, I think that there is a lot of, like, sexual freedom that comes with being bisexual. That's fun. You get to have it all. You know, like, um and I think in New Zealand, it's that you can. I mean, there are so many countries in the world where [00:21:00] we couldn't be having this discussion. And, um, I appreciate that, like so much, you know, I think that that's a wonderful fact about being a New Zealander. Um, is that you do have the freedom to love who you want to and be who you want to. The full transcription of the recording ends. A list of keywords/tags describing the recording follow. These tags contain the correct spellings of names and places which may have been incorrectly spelt earlier in the document. The tags are seperated by a semi-colon: 2000s ; 2010s ; Aotearoa New Zealand ; Australia ; Christmas ; Cuba ; Dunedin ; Events ; Marriage Amendment Act (2012) ; Marriage Equality ; Orange Is the New Black (tv) ; People ; Rule Foundation ; Skype ; South (series) ; Space ; Stuff ; Tabby Besley ; The O. C. (tv) ; University of Otago ; agenda ; biphobia ; bisexual ; board ; books ; coffin ; coming out ; community ; culture ; dating ; difference ; discrimination ; employment ; environment ; equality ; family ; feelings ; fetishism ; film ; freedom ; friends ; fun ; future ; gay ; gender ; growing up ; history ; homonormativity ; hope ; identity ; invisibility ; kissing ; labels ; language ; lesbian ; lifestyle ; love ; marriage ; marriage equality ; media ; monogamy ; news ; normal ; other ; parents ; parties ; podcast ; politics ; prejudice ; queer ; questioning ; race ; relationships ; representation ; role model ; sex ; sexual orientation ; sexuality ; social ; stereotypes ; straight ; support ; time ; trans ; trans man ; trans woman ; transgender ; university ; wedding ; women ; work ; youth. The original recording can be heard at this website https://www.pridenz.com/south_ellen.html. The master recording is also archived at the Alexander Turnbull Library in Wellington, New Zealand.  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