The title of this recording is "David - Q12". It is described as: David talks about being young and gay in 2012. It was recorded in Whanganui, Manawatū on the 16th August 2012. The duration of the recording is 14 minutes, but this may not reflect the actual length of the event. A list of correctly spelt content keywords and tags can be found at the end of this document. A brief description of the recording is: In this podcast David talks about being young and gay in 2012. The content in the recording covers the 2010s decade. A brief summary of the recording is: The podcast "David - Q12," recorded in Whanganui, Manawatū on the 16th of August 2012, explores the individual personal journey of a young person navigating their identity in society. The speaker shares their experiences of being young and gay in the early 2010s, addressing various aspects of their life including interests, cultural background, gender identity, and sexuality. With an affinity for Japanese culture, karate, and music, ranging from classical piano to club house music, the speaker underscores the complexity of their identity that extends beyond their sexuality alone. At 20 years of age, the speaker openly reflects on their gender identity, expressing feelings of being mentally female while being content with their current body, suggesting a non-binary understanding of their gender. With a Māori ethnicity and a self-identifying gay sexuality, they speak candidly about the absence of a defining moment in realizing their attraction to the same gender, describing it as a longstanding inclination rather than an epiphany. The podcast delves into the internal conflict the speaker experienced during adolescence, between ages 12 to 19, where they grappled with denial and even tried to convince themselves of asexuality to reconcile their feelings. Demystifying the coming out process, the speaker rejects the notion of 'coming out' as it forces an explanation of one's private life, unlike the automatic acceptance granted to heterosexuality. They describe their challenging coming out experience, marked by familial rejection, financial hardship, and the end of unconditional parental support resulting in the need for independence and a job. The discussion ranges from personal growth to societal perceptions, revealing how the speaker was forcibly outed by their sister, which led to hostility within their family. They describe how a period of isolation, compounded by social anxiety, affected their ability to form relationships and open up to others. Despite such challenges, they were able to find solace through the supportive environment of "Closet Space" and developed a sense of community through work and social media. The podcast further touches on the nuances of friendship, support networks, and the struggles of forming meaningful connections when faced with social anxiety. It highlights the importance of LGBT+ support groups to counteract the isolation often felt by individuals in similar circumstances. When discussing previous relationships and crushes, the speaker attributes their social anxiety as an obstacle, especially the uncertainty around others’ sexual orientations. Lastly, the speaker shares their conceptualization of virginity, linking it to physical intimacy rather than an emotional milestone, and closes the discussion with gratitude for the opportunity to share their story. The full transcription of the recording follows.  It includes timestamps every thirty seconds in the format [HH:MM:SS].  The transcription begins:  Hello. How are you today? I'm good. Thanks. What's your name? David. Can you tell us a little bit about yourself? Um, yeah. Sometimes I'm shy, and sometimes I'm outgoing. But yeah, If I don't know the person really well or we don't connect, then Yeah, then. Yeah. Interest or hobbies? Interests or hobbies? Um, Japanese karate [00:00:30] music. Piano? What type of music do you like? I'm classical and club music. House music. So what type of classical, like Mozart or something like that? Yeah, Just many classical piano. Um, So how old are you? 2020. And what is your, like, original sex male and gender identity. So, um, my gender identity. [00:01:00] Um, I've always thought that mentally I'm female. Well, that's what I've been thinking. I don't know, but I'm content with my body, so I don't know. I'm I think I'm a bit of both. Maybe that What is your culture? Identity, culture, identity. Like my ethnicity? Um, Maori. And what sexuality are you gay? And what is your [00:01:30] always forget this question. Who is having written it down? Um, how do you express yourself? In what way? Feminine. Mexican. Um, I different around different people. So I can get mascular ones, um, around some people feminine around others that I feel comfortable with a bit of both. Yeah. So when did you realise that you were OK? May, um I didn't actually, [00:02:00] like realise II. I didn't actually realise that I was gay, but, um, I just, like, knew it all along. It didn't come. I didn't come to a realisation or an epiphany or anything. So, um, was it more like a I've always liked boys. Yeah. It's like I've always liked boys. So you were born and this rainbow came out. No, I'm not a rainbow. Um, since [00:02:30] I was seven, maybe I started liking guys. I didn't I didn't like them sexually. It's just like an inclination of some sort. I don't know. I don't know what it was. It was, like, weird. So did you ever go through, like, a denial stage? A denial? Yeah, when I was when? When I was 12. To, like 19. Yeah, I just I [00:03:00] don't know. I just, um I didn't really think I was Well, I tried to convince myself that I was like, I don't know, asexuals like that. I didn't like guys at all but kept looking down. If I looked, if guys looked at me or I was afraid to look at other guys and yeah, that sort of denial Not like saying I'm not gay. I'm not gay. [00:03:30] It's like rejecting the idea that I that I like guys. It's just Yeah, I think I thought I was asexuals. I try to be done. Yeah, Yeah, it was a bit confusing back then. So what happened that made you accept that you were OK? I don't know. I was just watching YouTube videos, and there was, like, really inspirational people on there that I found, like, [00:04:00] um, people like or Chris Crocker? No, not really. Yeah, he has some good speeches, but he's a bit of a clown sometimes. So look at his makeup. Yeah. Danny Noriega. Um, Gregory Gorgeous. Yeah. There's people like that on YouTube, like, inspirational people [00:04:30] that I that, um, that I just decided to, like, express myself more. Yeah. So, um, have you ever thought they had to keep your sexuality a secret? A secret? Yeah, all the time. Like I would never ever think of coming down. If someone said you're gay, You're gay. They always said that. I said, No, I'm not. No, I'm not. I never said that. I like girls. I just say I'm not gay. So, um, are you [00:05:00] out? Yeah, I'm out. Yeah, Yeah. Are you out to everybody? Yeah, or I just I don't like that concept out because, um because you feel you feel like you have to explain yourself to the world. And really, no one else has to, like, straight people don't go outside and say I'm outside or I'm straight or I'm out of the Yeah, Yeah, I've always just been me so But when people [00:05:30] ask now, I'll just say yes, I am. If they question, then I'll just say yes. So, yeah, basically, I'm out. So, um, how was the when you came out to some people did. How was their reactions? Um, or I was forced down like by my sister because I told my sister because, um, I don't know. She was going away to Australia for, like, several months. [00:06:00] Yeah, I told her, and then she's like she was like, pretending she was OK with it. I was like, Oh, I'm putting on that little smile. But really, she was not OK with it. And then when she came back, um, yeah, she started bringing it up all the time. Like saying like, horrible things like, Hm, they get this or that And she was like, Think it's normal or say I don't believe in gay marriage or adoption [00:06:30] like I didn't feel comfortable just coming up to her because she's like abusing my trust a little bit. So then, um, we started arguing one night, I don't know over something I don't know. And she said, Do you want me to tell everyone I'm like, Tell them what I'm like. She was like, pressuring me to tell, and I just said Whatever, and I just told everyone I just said, I just said I'm gay. Yeah, in the lane, [00:07:00] they're like, staring at me and they're like, No, you're not. No, you're not. They're like shouting at me like saying right, there's no they get in my family like just the normal basic stuff that you hear. It's like typical and, um, yeah, and I started bursting out crying. I was like packing my stuff to move out, going to my grandmother's. I didn't come up to her yet they probably rang her. I tried to ring her, like, the next day, and she [00:07:30] found out by them obviously. And she didn't want me there either. So I just had to stay home and I was forced to get a job at McDonald's. My God, they used to pay for everything. Like my education. I had a car like, uh, it's just awful, like they just stopped doing everything for me. And I was forced to sort of, like, be independent on my own this year. [00:08:00] And, yeah, so that's my horrible coming out experience. Yes, for friends. Um, I was pretty isolated growing up because, um, I went to collegiate. Then I stopped collegiate because I don't know why. Because I was I developed social anxiety, and, um, it was hard for me [00:08:30] to make friends because I don't really open up that well. It was been it's hard. Been like opening up to my friends, right? Right now, because, um, because of your social anxiety Yeah, um I knew I came out to Jamie on Facebook, and then he called me and told me to come over and we started hanging out, and he told me about closet space, and I started going to closet space and yeah, basically it. [00:09:00] Yeah. So how about other friends before you went to closet space? Um, I only had, like, two good friends, Andrew and Slayden. Yeah, Um, that only lasted, like, two years and two friends in the intermediate was, like, hit him. I only gravitated towards gay people. Well, they didn't identify as gay back then, but yeah, just I didn't have [00:09:30] that many friends right now, just Yeah, but when you go to McDonald's, you search getting friends, and, um, I wouldn't call them my friends like acquaintances, but they have They started becoming, like your support group. In a way, Yeah. Closer space. Yeah. It's been a really good support group. I think we need more, um, more LGBT, um, groups out there because it's really isolating out there like, Well, [00:10:00] that's what I felt because, like, um, you can't identify with anyone else because everyone's, like, got girlfriends, boyfriends or whatever, and yeah, mhm. So, um, so your support kind of thing? Yeah. If you ever needed someone or anything like that to talk to Yeah, I would just, like text them, but some [00:10:30] of them don't text back. So not like that. I'm asking for heaps. It's just like, yeah, but most of them are busy or doing other things. Like it's like, I don't know. I can't really confide in, like, really, really confide to them because I'm like, we're not really, really close. We're just like, I don't know, just friends. Not past the close friends or best [00:11:00] friends or anything. Just friends. So, um, have you been in the relationship before? Um, no. Have you had crushes on guys? Heaps. Heaps? Oh, my God. He's in work. How about how about a crush on someone who is gay and someone who's gay? Hm? No, I don't think so. No one else that [00:11:30] I know of. Fair enough. Has, um, your social anxiety affected that in some sort of way? Yes, definitely. Um, I like to stop myself from looking at other guys because, um, yeah, I just get anxious that they might be straight or something, or I don't know, they might reheat me or it's mainly not knowing that if they're straight or gay, that's the main thing. If they're like gay, then maybe [00:12:00] I'll become a bit more open but not overtly that I Skype to them. Yeah. Yeah. So, um, how do you meet other people? Other people, like in the community, through space or Facebook? Um, through my work, I meet a lot of people like I do like the front counterparts, So, yeah. Um, yeah, Just a lot of random people, and they say hi on the street, and I actually don't know them, [00:12:30] but they know me because I'm, like, pretend that I'm happy there because you have to smile and say hello. Hi. McDonald's How may I help you? Can I have a big, big combo with extra cheese And, like, meat like chicken in the middle? Yeah. Special grows like that. So, um, what is your definition of virginity? Virginity? Um, not having [00:13:00] an orange oral sex. I think that's the definition. Do you think there's a different? Um, it could be a different version of virginity or, um, different to, like virginity. I've always thought of it as like a sexual thing. Like not having sex at all. Do you think? Could be an emotional thing as well, emotionally. What do you mean, emotionally [00:13:30] like? Well, in some ways, people have a slight personality change when they first have sex for the first time, they can either be more mature or be more. I don't know. Be something else or emotionally. Yeah. You mean not get affected. Or some people have Don't get affected. Some people do. Some people fall in love with the person They, um, had sex for the first time. I've always Yeah. [00:14:00] I don't think it's an emotional thing. I I've never seen it that way. I get I sort of see it like the innocence And, like, not getting emotionally like involved or other. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Anyway, um, thank you for the interview. Cool. Thank you. The full transcription of the recording ends. A list of keywords/tags describing the recording follow. These tags contain the correct spellings of names and places which may have been incorrectly spelt earlier in the document. The tags are seperated by a semi-colon: 2010s ; Aotearoa New Zealand ; Australia ; Closet Space ; Coming Up ; God ; Iran ; Japan ; Job ; LGBT ; Māori ; People ; Q12 (series) ; Space ; Stuff ; Sweden ; Whanganui ; abuse ; adoption ; anxiety ; cafe ; change ; closet ; coming out ; community ; crying ; culture ; denial ; education ; emotional ; ethnicity ; face ; facebook. com ; family ; friends ; gay ; gender ; gender identity ; growing up ; hit ; homophobia ; identity ; internet ; isolation ; karate ; love ; marriage ; masculine ; media ; music ; normal ; other ; piano ; podcast ; rainbow ; relationships ; sex ; sexuality ; shopping ; smile ; social ; social anxiety ; social media ; straight ; support ; takatāpui ; time ; top ; trust ; virginity ; voice ; witness ; work ; youth. The original recording can be heard at this website https://www.pridenz.com/q12_david.html. The master recording is also archived at the Alexander Turnbull Library in Wellington, New Zealand.  For more details visit their website https://tiaki.natlib.govt.nz/#details=ecatalogue.1089308. Please note that this document may contain errors or omissions - you should always refer back to the original recording to confirm content.