The title of this recording is "Ben (b) - Q12". It is described as: Ben talks about being young and gay in 2012. It was recorded in Napier, Hawkes Bay on the 16th September 2012. The duration of the recording is 14 minutes, but this may not reflect the actual length of the event. A list of correctly spelt content keywords and tags can be found at the end of this document. A brief description of the recording is: In this podcast Ben talks about being young and gay in 2012. The content in the recording covers the 2010s decade. A brief summary of the recording is: This summary encapsulates the contents and essence of a podcast titled "Ben (b) - Q12," recorded on September 16, 2012, in Napier, Hawke's Bay. The podcast features an approximately 19-year-old individual from Wellington discussing their journey of self-identification and experiences as a young gay person in 2012, touching on subjects spanning from early childhood realizations to present-day reflections. The conversation delves into personal interests, including a fondness for sci-fi comedy and a penchant for tourism and travel, with a prospective pivot toward the medical field in the coming years. Currently focused on studies in tourism and travel, the individual shares insights into their gender identity, sexuality, and how they choose not to strictly label their gender expression, preferring others to form their interpretations. The podcast recounts a pivotal moment at the age of 6, where an emotional connection with another male hinted at attractions that would only be acknowledged several years later. Although the realisation of attraction toward the same gender surfaced around age 11, it was not until the previous year from the recording that these feelings were fully embraced, following a period of denial spanning several years. The act of coming out is portrayed as a significant milestone, a revelation first confided to a sibling who was accepting and possibly already aware of their sexuality. The individual discusses the varying reactions of their family, with their mother's response being less accepting and tempered by religious views, indicating a complex relationship between parental acknowledgement and approval. The interview also touches on societal perspectives and community dynamics in Napier, the subject expressing a neutral stance towards any perceived adversity in the region regarding sexual orientation. While unfamiliar with the extent of the local gay community and interactions within, the person has only recently participated in a youth group known as Cuba. The individual's social ecosystem is explored, revealing that they are now open about their sexuality to most acquaintances, enjoying supportive relationships, especially within their immediate familial sphere. However, the person has thus far abstained from romantic relationships, pondering the concept of romance and reflecting on observed patterns of relationships that do not always result in enduring commitments. On the topic of meeting others within the LGBTQ community, social media platforms like Facebook and Twitter emerge as tools of engagement, while steadfast personal boundaries lead to the avoidance of more traditional dating websites, which evoke feelings of discomfort for the individual. In a frank acknowledgment of the darker aspects of their experience, the individual admits to encountering abuse and hostile behavior, including verbal and physical aggression, due to their sexual orientation. The full transcription of the recording follows.  It includes timestamps every thirty seconds in the format [HH:MM:SS].  The transcription begins:  Hello. How are you tonight? I'm good. Can you tell us a little bit about yourself? Um, I was originally from Wellington. Moved to when I was two. And I currently 19. Currently 19. Um, what's your likes and hobbies? Um, I'm interested in sci fi comedy type programmes. Um, I'm interested in tourism and travel at the moment. [00:00:30] I will probably move on to medicine in two years. Are you studying at the moment? Yes. Tourism and travel fun. And, um yes. Um, are you also working or just studying? Just studying. Just studying. So, um, what is your sex? Um, male male. Um, what is your What gender do you identify with male And [00:01:00] what is your sexuality? And what culture do you identify with? And how do you express yourself in a masculine, feminine way? In between camp twink bear cub? Uh, I let people design that judge by others judged by others. [00:01:30] When did you realise that you had attractions to the same gender? Probably 10, 11, 10, 11. What happened? Um, I know it would be earlier. Maybe six. Really. Six, 766767. Yeah. So [00:02:00] what was, um what happened? That made you realise that, um, I had a, um probably, uh, emotional connection to another male. Ok, did that emotional connection with the other male is the transformed into something else because they moved away. Puppy love at the age of six, but no. So, [00:02:30] um, did you ever deny your sexuality For about how long did you deny it? Maybe. And maybe, um, for a few years, A few years. And then you accepted it. At what age? Um, last year last year. But it's more than that. Makes no sense. You realised when [00:03:00] you were six and you denied it for a few years. And now last year he accepted it when I was six. I just started it and I realised when I was 11, then for May. Maybe several. Not a few. That makes more sense. So when you were 11, what made you realise that you that you're attracted to males can't quite put my was it like looking? You [00:03:30] noticed, Like all the boys in your class. Seems you seem to be attracted to or something. Something similar like that. So, um, So I accepted it last year. Yes. What was going through Your mind. Um, I was attracted to males [00:04:00] apart from that, um, that I didn't have to hide who I really was That you didn't have to keep it a secret. I didn't have to hate me for me. When did you come out? Last year. Last year. So, um who did you come out to first? My sister. What was her reaction? She was accepting? How did you actually told her? How did you tell [00:04:30] her? Did you like it out to her? I think she knew, though. Did she say something like, Oh, yeah, I knew she did. Did you say to her? Why didn't you tell me? Uh, I think my whole family, um, knew did Did they actually say? Oh, yeah. It was obvious. Uh, yeah, something like that. Yeah. So I noticed that you never brought any girls home, But you've always had the occasional best friend. [00:05:00] Uh, probably, uh, Well, my best friend is a person is a, um someone. Someone who's by. So. And they knew that he was by They knew that he was by, Has she? No, that's That's not a good stuff for me. Um Did they knew that she was by, um, I don't think they do. No, I tell them. You know, it's not your place to tell them [00:05:30] exactly. Yeah. So, um, what's it like being a gay person in Napier? We have to go over that. Yeah. I. I don't really mutual feelings, mutual feelings. I don't really think it's that bad. You don't think it's that bad? I wouldn't change my sexuality. That's what you need? No, not if it changes your sexuality. [00:06:00] Um, does, um, do you ever feel like, um, there is that you feel like, alone or something like that? Or do you feel like there's that they appear as abusive place for gay people or anything like that? Uh, 50 50 50 50? Yeah. How big is the community in Napier? The gay community? I would have no idea. You don't have any idea? No. Is there a youth group in? [00:06:30] Isn't this uh maybe Cuba? Cuba? Where's QA? I would have no idea. You just know about Cuba, but you don't attend it. I know about Cuba. I've never heard about Cuba before. Hm. So, um yes, yes. Um, So So you never [00:07:00] attended new K? Um, I have just joined recently District recently. So, um, when you came out, did you come out to your friends? Um, we came out to my sister. We've been over. This is the first person you came out to. Is your sister the only person that you came out to? Um, yes, at that time. What [00:07:30] about now? Probably majority of people I know. Know? Yeah. What? What was their reaction? They were accepting? We would hope. Yes, we would. Hope. Yeah. So have you. How many people are actually out to the majority of them? How many people are you out to, like your school friends or your parents? Parent parent? Um, she knows [00:08:00] that's good. So, um, you have a bit of a support system for people supporting your sexuality. That's good. So, um, have you been in relationships before? No. No. Why is that? Because I didn't want a relationship. Do you feel like you could be a What's it called? Um, as well. No, not as a romantic. Do you feel like that? You're asexuals? [00:08:30] No. No, he's very sure of that. No, I like my sex. Um, So, um, do you feel that? Sort of maybe on the a romantic. It's a possibility. Why do you feel that? Because I believe people will fall in love, But then it eventually won't work. Hm. Ok, Is there any particular [00:09:00] reason why you feel that way? Because I've seen it time after time. Haven't we all? Yeah, we all. I guess we all have seen that, but not necessarily always end. Look at my grandparents. They like they've been together for, like, 50 something years. I think my mum's not that accepting. She's more religious, though. OK, How was [00:09:30] that when you told her? Was she, um what happened was she laughed. It was horrible. She laughed at your sexuality. In what way? Well, obviously was. Was it like a Ha ha? No, But seriously, like, Oh, what a funny joke kind of thing. Or she was like, mocking you. It was a funny joke. It's like she thinks my best friend, like we're in a relationship. It's just odd. But you and your boy friend [00:10:00] Yes. Who is not currently in New Zealand. She's back in Germany. Oh, is she from Germany? So that's strange. Really? Do you feel like she's, um Is she a closed minded type person? I probably. No. No, she's not. She's just trying to deny. I think we have conflicting views. [00:10:30] Is she, um, denying your sexuality or is just not accepting? Um, that would probably be 70% Um, accepting, probably tiny, but not This is a bit she accepts you because you're her son. But at the same time, she doesn't like it. Yeah, basically. So, um, how do you meet other people in the LGBTI [00:11:00] Q community? Um hm. How would I describe that? Um mm. Facebook, maybe. Twitter. Twitter? Yeah. Do you use Twitter? Yeah, I do use Twitter, but I know that people would actually be good to find people. Yeah, you just follow people. [00:11:30] You know what their thoughts are. Isn't that the whole point, but slightly. But I get conversations with people on Twitter. Of course, we're thinking together. So, um, so you use Facebook and Twitter? Oh, I barely use Facebook. Now, Twitter is a new thing for you. [00:12:00] Facebook is the pastime. I find facebook exhausting. Don't we all is there? Um do you ever use like something like NZDAK a inter dating or manhunt or grinder? You've used manhunt I was gonna say is avoid dating sites. Yeah. Why is that? Because [00:12:30] I find them disgusting. I feel so disgusted in myself. I feel like I've been, um, over overly experienced in this dating site. So, um, so what is your what? I was just saying it's 21 21. What does that mean? The time I was going to say [00:13:00] I thought there was some talk. Anyway, um, where was I? Oh, yes. Um, what is your personal definition of virginity? Um, taking ones having, um I wouldn't know. Maybe. Um um, first time, maybe. Do you feel like it's only a physical thing? No. It can be an emotional thing as well. [00:13:30] Yes. OK, then. Oh, have you ever received or experienced any abuse or abusive behaviour because of your sexuality or gender identity? Um, yes. Haven't we all? Would you like to expand on that, uh, probably abusive name calling. Uh, what else? What's the What's the biggest thing [00:14:00] that has happened to you in an abusive way? Um, I got a shoe thrown at my head. Really? Yes. Who throws a shoe will say that throwing a shoe at someone's the worst offence. The worst off? Yeah, I got a shoe thrown at my head. Really? Was it in class or something back in high school or something? So when people, um, verbally [00:14:30] abuse you, what do they say? Um, big game. I know. Whatever you know. And what do you react to that? How do you I just ignore it because it doesn't really affect me anymore, because it's like, Yes, I am well done. Well, thank you for the interview. Thank you. The full transcription of the recording ends. A list of keywords/tags describing the recording follow. These tags contain the correct spellings of names and places which may have been incorrectly spelt earlier in the document. The tags are seperated by a semi-colon: 2010s ; Aotearoa New Zealand ; Germany ; Hawkes Bay ; LGBT ; Napier ; People ; Q Bay (Napier) ; Q12 (series) ; Rainbow Youth ; Wellington ; Youth ; abuse ; advice ; army ; camp ; change ; class ; comedy ; coming out ; community ; culture ; dating ; email ; emotional ; energy ; facebook. com ; family ; friends ; gay ; gender ; gender identity ; grandparents ; homophobia ; identity ; internet ; love ; manhunt. com ; masculine ; other ; parents ; podcast ; rainbow ; relationships ; religion ; romantic ; school ; sci-fi ; sex ; sexuality ; support ; time ; top ; tourism ; travel ; twitter. com ; violence ; youth. The original recording can be heard at this website https://www.pridenz.com/q12_ben_b.html. The master recording is also archived at the Alexander Turnbull Library in Wellington, New Zealand.  For more details visit their website https://tiaki.natlib.govt.nz/#details=ecatalogue.1089332. Please note that this document may contain errors or omissions - you should always refer back to the original recording to confirm content.