The title of this recording is "Queer-Straight Alliances - Marriage Equality Conference". It was recorded in Community House/Press Hall, 80 Willis Street, Wellington on the 1st December 2012. This is a recording of an event and features the voices of Tabby Besley and partially identified voice(s). Their names are spelt correctly, but may appear incorrectly spelt later in the document. The duration of the recording is 51 minutes, but this may not reflect the actual length of the event. A list of correctly spelt content keywords and tags can be found at the end of this document. A brief description of the recording is: In this podcast Tabby, Griffin and Tommy from the newly formed QSA Network Aotearoa (now InsideOUT Kōaro) talk about Queer-Straight Alliances and organising in schools. Participants then share their own experiences. This session was recorded during the Marriage Equality Conference held at Community House in Wellington. The content in the recording covers the 2010s decade. The audio recording begins:  Hey, so, um, we're Tabby, Gryphon and Tommy. Um, and we're from the QS a network. Um, so this is a little statement about us. Um, we aim to empower young people to take up leadership opportunities, make positive change in their schools and connect with other youth leaders. Um, so I just tell you a little bit about the history. Um, So we rose out of work that was done in the Nelson region. Um, where basically there was an organisation set up called, which is a community group kind of like schools out in Wellington. Um, and we worked with all of the most of the schools in the region to set up Queer Straight Alliance support groups in the schools. Um, and it seemed like a model that works really well and was really like, um, necessary. Um, So I became really passionate about spreading that and thinking, Why doesn't the whole country have this opportunity? Um so, um, myself and these people, when Joseph and some others um, founded PS a network this year, Um, the idea did come out last year, and, um, we ran a first project which was the high school diversity tool and we'll tell you a bit more about that. Um, this year, our main project was running a national, um, which we did in July in Wellington. And we had people come from all over the country for that. Um, and recently we've registered as a charitable trust, which is really exciting, because, um, everything we've been doing is voluntary. Um, basically, I've been doing this as a kind of job all year, but not being paid for it. So I'm really excited to hopefully get some funding for the new year. Um, and that will really, um, enable our capacity to do development work. So the mission is, um so we really want to, um, connect Q SAS to each other between schools and connect community resources through port leadership, development and training. And, um yeah, so we support young people in starting strengthening and sustaining Q SAS and building capacity to create a space for students can socialise in a safe environment, provide support for students who might be facing issues such as bullying and spread awareness about homophobia, transphobia, gender, identity, blah, blah, blah and skills. Oh, you can read that for me. Oh, yeah. So here So here are some interesting stats, and they're from youth. 07 E. Yeah, so they're from the 2007, um, survey from 100 different high schools. I think it was, um yeah. So why we needed one in 12 youth identify as same or both. Sex attracted. Um, 88% of you know, by the time they're 15 54% of queer youth have been hit or harmed, compared to 42% of straight youth. Um, yeah. Those who are bullied five times as many were bullied because they were gay or because people thought they were gay. Um, queer are three times more likely to get depressed. And straight youth and que queer youth are six times more likely to attempt suicide than straight youth. Um and so those statistics are from 2007. But this year, there was another survey commissioned. So next year we'll get the new statistics. Um, there was also one done in 2001, and between 2001 and 2007, things didn't change much at all. So it'll be really interesting to, um So the new statistics, which also, um, survey change gender and gender queer use in high school. So I'm really excited to find out more about them. Uh um, So there's just some more statistics about, um, the bullying. And so I guess you just talking more about why we're really needed. Um, the bullying is a lot, um, more for, um, young people who are affected for the same for, um, process people. Um, yeah, this one's the same for, um, a lot of them don't go to school and start, um, waiting and things like that because it's not a safe place for them to be. So having a QS a in school really just provides that safe environment, even if it's only once a week, there's somewhere within the school that they can go. Um, um, So this is some of the stuff about what we can offer. And his name is this, um, I say what we can offer, but, um, because we're not funded at the moment, it is all voluntary, and there's a lot more and a lot wider. Um, that we want to go with this, um, so, resources, we've got, um, working with, um this is a pack on starting your diversity group or Quest Trade alliance. Um, it's got heaps of information. Um, which is really awful. Um, and we really want to, like, make our website a really, like kind of one stop shop for information around, um, bullying in schools and quest alliances and diversity groups. And, um, because there's not really resources or information out there. There's this book that nobody really knows that it's out there. Um, so I guess we're passionate about spreading that and letting people know that there is somewhere they can go for support for this kind of stuff. Um, support, Um, one thing we're really keen on starting this kind of regional checking groups around the country. Um, for QS a leaders in that region. So we're just starting at one in Wellington. Um, and it's a chance for all of the, um, student leaders, um, of those groups in the region to come together and share their challenges and stories. Maybe collaborate on events and stuff. Um, so it can be quite isolating to lead a group like that in the school. Um, so giving opportunities for people to come together and, um share very important to us. Um, we We're also available. Um, kind of because we're based out of Wellington, but we are a national organisation. Um, so we're really happy to do email, Phone Skype support in person where we can. We're passionate about getting out to rural areas and getting support. Um, one day, hopefully, we'll have regional coordinators all around the country, but that's probably a bit far off. Um, do you want to talk about the network? Um, yeah. So I don't know if you mentioned already. So one of the really great things we do for networking is we hold national. Um, and so our recent one this year we had QS a leaders from all around New Zealand come together and all kind of work together and learn about leadership and work together. So connecting QS a groups between schools, but also, um, within the community, like we talked about earlier. Um and yeah, you mentioned the regional chickens. That would be really great. For so not only connecting with other national groups, but within cities and areas, um, and online again, I think like, especially once the website is more of a one stop shop, but, um especially young people like online and Facebook. And that kind of communication is really works really well with that generation. So, yeah, um, that's something that we're really keen to continue doing. And we're doing is, um, supporting leaders online? Um, that's Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Um, education, um, so we can offer education for the leaders of QS A groups and for the groups and in the schools for setting up maintaining, strengthening QS a groups and workshops on leadership. Um, some of those we will do at other times, we might go into schools and help as individual groups. Um, and we also offer, um, a diversity education package, which is written by Rainbow Youth. Um, and that's available through health classes. But we can also give it to, like, anyone really community groups, um, workplaces, schools in general. Yeah, um, and it's a really amazing, accessible package of information. It kind of focuses on sexual orientation, gender identity and focus is really on you, but it's applicable to kind of working well with any anyone who's queer. Yeah, Um, that package is especially great because it's not like, um, you need to be nice to be gay. people or anything like that. It's kind of, um, quite activity. I focused or, um, interactive. And it gets people kind of thinking themselves. Oh, yeah, that's a problem. What can we do about it? Um, especially with the students. So that's, um, a really cool thing about it. Um, and another thing is national campaigns. So, um, one of the things I think is really cool about quest alliances in schools is that they have the power to change the culture of the whole school. Um, by So it doesn't need to just be a social support group for, um, a few people in the school. It has the power to change things. Um, throughout the school. Um, so some of the ideas we have for this you'll probably have heard of, like, fake shirt day. Um, that's it happens in quite a few schools around the country, But wouldn't it be awesome if they were all really doing that? Um, and that's around anti-bullying. If you don't know, Um, another one is the day of silence. And that's the day where, um, people take their mouths and don't speak for the day, um, to represent the silence that a lot of clear people go through about their identities and have a little card that that's why they're doing it. Um, and that's really popular with schools because, um, especially the junior students, they're like, Ha, ha. We have to talk for the day. Um, so they they do it because it's fun and rebellious or something. Um, but through doing it, they find out, um, they have this card and the stickers and stuff and like, they're supporting all the stuff. Even if that's not the original reason they did it, they get to learn about it and, um, and help speed awareness. Um oh, yeah. The international day of, um, against homophobia and transphobia is another one. and there's lots more. So things like that would really like to kind of, um have happening in lots and lots of schools around the country to really spread that awareness and maybe get some, um, good media attention around it as well. Mhm. Um, So I thought I'll tell you a little bit about the high school diversity tour that was done in 2011. Um, so that was done by the executive director of Q and Nelson at the time. Stuart, Um, and Olympian, um, speed skater Blake Skill up. And they toured 18 schools across New Zealand speaking in school assemblies, Um, about homophobic bullying. Basically, um, that was really powerful to have Blake as a New Zealand athlete, um, standing up and saying that he was gay and that kind of had a big impact. I think for a lot of students, just because of the way our culture is in New Zealand, around rugby and so on, Um and that Yeah, that tool really focused on going to rural areas because there's already, um there's more support in some of the main centres than there is in those rural areas. If you don't get much at all. Um, we did all those things, um, feedback. So one third of the schools visited and set up as trade alliances as a result of the tour, and all of the schools reported really good feedback from both the students and the staff. Um, so we'd love to do something like that again. Um, and crap, we kind of already talked about the of it. So there's just a couple of photos from the Who we ran in July, and that's something we want to do at least annually. Um, it was such a such an amazing experience. And you can just see, um, for a lot of the young people that it's the first time they've ever been in an environment like that that's been inclusive and fully accepted them for who they are. And you can just, like, see the change in them really, really amazing. Um, so how does this one go? Um, 100% of participants were satisfied with the project that it met. The need in their community would attend again if they had the chance and would tell their friends to attend. There's, um, a few quotes from young people who are attending, um, at So this is what we've been doing kind of in the last few months. Um, again, because there are support groups in the main centres Wellington, Auckland, Christchurch, et cetera. Um, for queer youth, even though there's still not that much in schools. Um, it's a lot more than there is in some places. Um, so we've been doing some work in the north, and last week we were in South Auckland. Um, this Me a wonderful bunch of and they all, like, shared these deep stories with us, And then they, um, sung to us and, um, they now setting up the lights, which is awesome closet space in which is this whole support group. Um, and we did. Lots of we started some work with some of the high schools around there to get groups in their schools because the building there was just shocking. Um, so we're hoping to go back there early next year and really continue that, Um I thought I better put something about marriage equality in, um, so we did some work encouraging que alliances all over the country to get their groups and individuals in the groups to submit on the bill. Um, so young people sitting down writing a big submission might not be the best, um, way to get them to do it. So I suggested, um, you know, get creative with it, make a video, make a, um, signs and take photos, and then make a slide show and send that in things like that. So these are some from, um, girls, which is Nelson Girls College. Um, this one got famous on Tumblr. If you know Tumbler, it's a blog. Internet, blogging. Um, so maybe open for any questions. And then I thought maybe we could just go around. Um, people could introduce themselves and say anything that has come up for them. If you want to talk about, um, what school was like for you or, um, how if you have any ways to help us, and that would be awesome because we don't have, um, money or resources. Um, yeah. And anything that you'd like to talk about, I guess. Um, yeah. So questions maybe fix. I'm interested to know like this because I've never been involved in A and I've never seen one really have them. So I'm really interested to know how the way I perceive it to be. There are a very small group of people involved in this, um, safe social environment. And then but the rest of the school, it's it's kind of very separate. So I understand what you're saying about that, like, the small group can influence the bigger culture on campus, but I'm wondering how that happens. Like, how does it go from being the gays to? Yeah, um I mean, there's, I think there's a variety between it will depend on your school and how accepting it is in general, um, and the group and how comfortable they are being out and garden the school or whatever. Um, I think, yeah, if the group wants to do school wide events and activities, um, and kind of really promote themselves and that it becomes part of the school culture. Um, I went to college in Nelson, um, where we had, um, Nags, which is of alliance of Gays and Strass, which I changed to que Andras. Um, and that was probably the first que straight alliance in Australasia. Um, which is really exciting. Um, and over the time it's go next year, we have been going for 10 years. Um, from the time I was at the school, even I just saw, um, the culture of the chain culture of the school change. Um, even just saying that's so gay. Um, by the end of the time, I was leaving school people. If someone said it, a teacher or another student would kind of call you up on it. Um, and that was, you know, it wasn't really tolerated, which is um, you can't say that for a lot of schools in New Zealand. I don't think, um and that's because of the advocacy of both the straight and the queer students. Like going out to the wider school community and saying, Hey, this is not OK and this, you know, marginalises the community and educating from a youth perspective to a youth perspective, that's a real strength of it, I think. Also having supportive staff members, um, to get on board and stand with the group, um is really important. Um, And you having, um, where you kind of encourage people like the student leaders of the schools, peer mentors and things like that to, um, to join the group or actively support it? Because they're, um, looked up to in the school as the you know, they're generally, like the popular academic, um, well liked people. Um, so to see people like that, supporting um the lands group is can be a really powerful thing for the rest of the school. To kind of witness and talking to a straight person who I was at a leadership course with who went to college. She said that she felt because of the existence of Nags that she was so much safer to be whoever the hell she wanted to be, whether that was queer straight, um, into gaming or into something else. You know, anything. She felt free to be herself because of the existence of this group that advocated for diversity. Yeah, I guess that's another thing about these groups they tend to attract, Um, not just queer people who are, um, in a minority or whatever. They attract anyone who's different or doesn't really feel that they've got a place they can kind of be that which is really nice. What do you have? Um, place which teaches you is that people like teachers should be taking care of their own problems in the sense that they have, because they've stuck out for that for whatever happens to be on. I feel that teachers can get I mean, but that's not exactly the students should be shorting them, should be giving them training or stuff like that. We've got good look with the PP a and the Rainbow Task force within that which have been Yeah, really helpful. Um was very early on in our week, so we haven't, um, done much with teachers. But one thing I'd really like to do at some point is kind of a Hoy for teachers and guidance counsellors who support the students in these groups or out in schools. Because I think, um, yeah, a chance for them to come together will be really powerful. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Uncle Stupid, etcetera. Um, and the education package that we do, um, it has an exercise in that where it teaches them that that's you know, what do you really mean when you say that, um, we use an example where we use someone's name and then, you know, how would you feel? How do you feel after, you know, a term of that being said multiple times a day and it really makes people understand. And then it's kind of we we set a challenge. So next week, when we come back to do the next session with you, Um, see, if you can not say it in the whole week or say it less than you normally do, um, and really encourage them to take up the challenge. So the more that that education package can get into schools um, the better. Oh, yeah, It's everywhere. Yeah. You can't avoid it, I. I heard it in primary school. I've been hearing it since I was five, and it's just yeah, not just in school for me. I find that I don't like the word gay to identify myself because it's been so derogatory. Mhm. Did you get that name? Things from the Wa Sites Club. It's a really awesome YouTube, but he demonstrates that by going up to the two guys, it's like, Yeah, I've seen that Rainbow has developed the education package because that's a gap in it. So I'm not sure if they did or not. Sorry I was late, so I miss this, but, um, yeah, are you talking about like, Yeah, um well, we're national, so we operate everywhere. In a way. Um, there aren't any groups currently, um, in Dunedin. There's a few in Christchurch. Um, that's an area that we really want to try and get to next year. Um, it's a matter of, um and just to build on that, I mean, I'd be quite happy, and I'm sure some of the people in the room would be quite happy to go back to their school and help you if you wish. And I mean going back to my school. So quite a conservative country in town, Um, most of them just rugby players. I mean, the, um the stories that I'm able to go back to and say, Hey, this is what I've done since I've been here. And you know that liberation of, you know, you can do whatever you want to do And providing those examples from experience especially, um would be quite helpful, especially for us. I mean, Andrew, pick one. Yeah, definitely. I think that's something that really works as well, because it's hard for an outside organisation to go into a school and say, Hey, you're que you have queer students and they're not, you know, they're being bullied, and all this is happening. Do something about it. We can't really do that. Um, which is probably why there isn't groups in all the schools. You really need people who have been to that school or in the school currently to kind of stand up or, um, teachers and guidance counsellors as well. To say, you know, there there is a problem. I've experienced it, but I've seen it happening. Um, and I want to do something about it, so yeah, definitely former students telling their stories. Um, it's really helpful with the, uh, school in South Auckland Was culture a barrier in terms of it doesn't look like it. Um, in terms of how we connected with them, Um, I think from my perspective, um, I felt that I had a lot to learn about, um, connecting with people from, um, some cultures and so on. Um, just mainly because of the way that we talk about sexual orientation and gender identity is very different. Um, we also went to the, um, just before that, and we kind of felt the same thing. Um, so, yeah, I feel like we've got a lot to learn, but from the young people relating to us straight away, they were like telling their stories. And it was all we needed to do was tell our stories like I just shared a really, you know, generic story about how I felt like I was the only gay in my village in high school. And then they, like, poured out their hearts, you know? And so they just connected with us on that level to hear Older people who had been through school and were just recently out of school had survived, you know, and identified, you know? Yeah, this may be a really stupid question, because, um, how much money would a single schools need to sustain itself? That's a hard question, because, um, the QS a groups and the the schools don't necessarily like it's not a necessity to have money to run a group in a school. Um, my my group, we did, um, we had a bank account within the school, and we did fundraisers so we could go to the and, um, buy food for our meetings and things like that, which is really great. Um, but those can be self sustained. Um, but to support those groups from our organisation Um, I. I mean, I can't say how much money that would take, like if we're talking about a whole country. And I guess another reason I was passionate about starting this up is, um, because I had been in the group at my school that had, um and it's been going for nearly 10 years, and that was really awesome. But I often heard from other young people that I would meet at who and stuff that Oh, we tried to set up a group that didn't really work, you know, we're too scared to do it again. Um, yeah. Tommy had an experience with his group. Didn't really work. He's about I didn't have appropriate support. I didn't have someone that was, like, really on to Q SAS and knew you know about my problems and were well equipped enough to, you know, deal with them. And that's the real value of this organisation is that they're focusing on high school groups. Q SAS. So if we wanted to put a QS a in our old high school would be the best way for us to approach the students directly. Or would it be to go through you guys to them? Um, I would suggest if you have students who are currently at the high school, talk to them, tell them about us, see if it's something they're interested in doing, and that would be really awesome. Um, and then But you need to bring us in to support them. Otherwise, Yeah, So, as we've been seeing, um, groups just aren't getting the support and they don't know how how to run a group. What do you do in a group? Um, how do you make it in close to all that stuff? So that's what we How do you keep members? How do you get new members? How do you get juniors involved? Et cetera. Um, so that's the kind of stuff that we talk about and teach at our um, so it's really important for people to as many people to try and come along to those as possible. And those are the kind of resources that we want to build. Yeah. Yeah. We really want to be able to build those resources and get more connections in different regions so that we can, um, get get support people in different regions and get speakers to go along to meetings And, um, things like that. Yeah. Um, how do you S a, um, groups relate to other groups in the school like the other groups, Christian union groups, et cetera. That's a good question. Um, we promote that it's really awesome to engage with other groups in the school. Um, at my school, we would have, like, shared lunches with the Christian group, and it worked really well. We respected each other's opinions. Um, and that was really cool to kind of See that, um, and show that, um, yeah, you can have all those other parts of your identity as well. Um, acknowledge those, I guess, um, and things like amnesty international groups and schools. They like quite good groups to work alongside. So, yes, I think it's good to do that. Um, I'm not really a question, but sort of to to comment on the young man. Um, I'm a teacher, and I didn't teach at a school with a homophobic, homophobic principles. But in fact, it was the gay teachers, um, and teachers who supported those gay teachers who gave the support to the students. And I think you know, you've got contacts with the PPTO with the group etcetera in the PPT a. And if someone was wanting to set up a group in the school, it would be good to see if there if there are gay teachers who are out in that school and then approach them as well. Definitely. Psycho. Cool. So maybe should we start around. And if you've got any more questions or anything you wanna say, You can say it as we do that. Um, I'm I'm William. I'm a couple of years out of high school. It wasn't terribly exciting. Yeah, Nothing else to add. OK, I'm a I'm a teacher librarian at Wellington High School, which is a non uniform, liberal, coed inner city school. Um, there's been a gay questioning transgender et cetera group in the school for a large number of years. Um, but one of the things I was thinking about when you were talking was that, you know, to get some of those resources into a school library would be incredibly good and to the school counsellors. Um, so there are things like that that a school library or a teacher who's supportive can actually do to make people feel more comfortable. And, I mean, we've actually had students um, come, um, dressed as queens with their heels and their wigs and makeup and being just accepted into class as if that is normal. Good to know that it's happening. Um, I'm Natalie. I am co-chair, um legalised love Waikato. Um, and that's really good to hear about that. And I'm really grateful for that because I have a perception of what Q SAS might look like, and it's it's somewhat different to that. So I'm really glad to be enlightened. Um, and also good to, um, it would be good to have a chat a bit later about how you engage in youth and these kind of diversity issues. Because, um, I'm passionate about bringing in in at a younger age and talking about diversity, um, within primary education. And so that's really interesting to see how you tackle those ideas, that this is an adult issue and that, um, it's a no go area, so yeah. Thanks. I'm tell you. I'm also from legalised lab about, um I'm quite interested in education. I'm an early childhood teacher. So talking about diversity. Sorry. Talking about diversity at a young age is quite important to me. Um, and we've been talking a little bit about setting up some sort of a QS a type thing in Waikato, so it was very interesting. That's me. I'm Murray. Um I'm also from legal. I love. And, um, I've had the privilege of being to a few QS a who Which completely blew my mind. Um, um, not until after I left high school, Unfortunately, But, um I just think they're really exciting just because, um, I was really amazed by the way young people talk about sexuality and gender and, like, such a fluid and all embracing way that, like, we just don't do in the queer community. Well, not that I experienced before going to those things, so I was really excited. It was cool. Cool. Um, I'm Sam. I'm also just I've just finished uni this year, so I'm not too far out of high school either. Um, I kind of have one of those. Boring. Stereotypical. My high school was kind of a only gay in the village type environment as well. Um, but one point that I thought I just want to echo that was made earlier down there is that, uh I think quest straight lights are fantastic, and the more the better. But I think, um, something that really needs to happen is to provide more ways for young people to interact with and express their sexuality. So not just being able to join the alliance, but being able to access more information about it, go to parties and groups. Um, organised by groups like Q SAS. Um and so to see, sort of that Q SAS develop more. But also, to use those as springboards the other ways in which young people can sort of find out more about or, um, express their sexuality would be great, because So I found that when I came to university, and all those things were, um, here and open to me. But if I had that open to me or those types of opportunities open to me when I was at high school, I think it, you know, it would have been awesome. Well, I'm Cameron. I'm from Christchurch. Um, I don't really have any other other comment. Apart from I went to the most fantastic high school in the world. Hackley High school. You know, um, it was popular to be gay. As soon as you come out, everybody's like, Oh, my gosh, you're my best friend, Pat on the back. So, yeah, that's basically the only comment I can make. So it's true. Ok, um, James, more than a couple of years out of high school. Um, um, yeah, probably nothing to add to that, but, uh, fascinating to hear. Thank you. Hi. I'm Emma. Um, I also went to school in Nelson, but not nail in college. And maybe, unfortunately, I'm not sure. And, um, yeah, I'm I just think that maybe like an well, I, uh So I'm I'm straight. But I'm just really supportive of, like, queer rights and stuff like that, largely because, um, my really close friend from high school, um, committed suicide. He was gay. And, um, it still breaks my heart, like every day. Um, and so, like, maybe an influence, like not a campaign, not a campaign. It's the wrong word. But like a like a what to do if you feel suicidal or feel depressed or, you know, you know, it's getting too much, kind of like emphasis or something, or, um would be really useful, because, I mean, I know he struggled with such thoughts for, like, years before he actually committed suicide. So yeah, yeah, I know. Yeah, I know. I think it's changed quite a lot, like because I finished in 2006, and like, even the difference between like when my brother finished in 2009 and and me was quite staggering, I didn't realise what the circle was about. But now, um, the So I went to, uh, a Maori boarding school and brought up in the Maori environment. The I think, uh, Queer Strait alliance is is amazing and that the alliance aspect of it and the outreach of your particular group to create a space for, uh to tell their stories is fantastic. Uh, on the cultural side, that's another debate that goes on within the culture. But there are values within the culture such as, uh, with one another, um, that will combat that side of things. But to be able to create a space to allow, uh, Maori or any other cultures to express themselves and to allow themselves to talk about their sexuality and gender identity, however they want to express themselves would be a great value. I feel so. I'm Kevin and I live in Greymouth. Um, but I went to school in Hamilton in the 19 seventies and, uh, we didn't have a QS a group in Hamilton Boys High. I don't know if they have one now. You know, it doesn't seem likely. I have. I have I have always had that fantasy of going back to my high school and and educating them on what life is really about. They've never They've never invited me back. Um, I came across the idea of Q SAS in probably about 1990 when, um, Kathleen Quinlivan was promoting the idea. And I must say at the time, I thought, This is never going to work. Um, and I was completely wrong, which I'm very pleased about. And so what I'm focused on at the moment is, um, actually doing some work with with Murray, Um on kind of what might the top down response be like? So So, uh, if if if I get to be part of the government or what are the what are the policies that we want to put in place to facilitate? Uh, the having Q SAS in every school, Um, and a whole bunch of other policies that would become nationally standard. So that's kind of that's That's where I said. But I'm also interested in the the the bottom up of how can we resource the the group that's going now. Thank you. Jorda. I'm Sarah. Um it's really great to hear you guys talk II. I love the work that you're doing. Um, and I just thank God that would have been amazing. You know, when I was at school and, um, you know, I suppose I think you know, someone of my age. You know, um, you know, we've all lost a lot of people, and it might not have happened, you know, if this had been around longer, so, you know, awesome work. Um, I'm also along with the gym. I'm involved in out of work, which is, um, you know, queer union work. And I'm just thinking, you know, listening to how you guys operate, I'm thinking, Oh, there's lots of lessons here. You know, um, that we can learn in our work, like, for making safe workplaces as well. So yeah, I want to talk to you guys more. Everyone. My name is Joseph. I'm with legal guys, love Wellington. Um, I've had the pleasure of being to quite a few that, uh, a network and Q you have put on, um, one of the the single best experience so far has been the most recent one where I was, like helping to organise and some of the you know, uh, some of the younger people came up and at the start of the like, anyone else, Um they sort of said, you know, I, I feel a bit like I. I don't know many people here. It's an uncomfortable experience Yada, yada, yada at the end of it. Um, they said this is not only an accepting place. This is the single most accepting and loving atmosphere that I've ever encountered in my life, and that mirrored my personal experience down to a T. And it was just wonderful to actually see this replicated in people that are just coming. So it I, I actually I can't emphasise enough how absolutely heartwarming and empowering, Um, the QS a network. And and it's who we are. And I think that, you know, if if the world could be like life and one of those who heaven would be on earth, So I'm done. Um, my name is, um obviously, I'm You might all know me by now, but I'm the conference chair. Um, I went to Southern and Boys High School, which, um, right at the bottom of the country almost, uh, you can imagine what it would be like. Uh, but, um I mean, I think one of the things that I didn't know is what What it was like to be queer at all. So I came out quite late. It wasn't until I was well, two years ago that I came out. And, um, I think it's been quite an amazing feat in itself. Um, while I wasn't out, I was very supportive of the community. Uh, and we did try to set up, uh, a uniq on campus at Massey Albany. Uh, while I was student president, and while it was unsuccessful, um, while I was there, I went back, unfortunately, was welcomed back by the community. And, um, they, uh, have changed. Um, just by putting that little people into the to the water. And while I wasn't successful, you go back onto campus and, you know, we're everywhere, and it's, you know, you see so many fabulous looking people and so happy just to be out. Um, and that's what we didn't have when I was at Mass. Albany. But to be able to do this in schools is a effect as well, so well done. Hello, everyone. I'm Rosie. Um, I love I think you guys are doing an amazing job, and I think it's really inspiring. And I think being in schools is where it's at. Um, I remember I went to school in Palmerston North. Um, I really love being at school, but I was felt really isolated, and it was a really difficult experience. Um, in retrospect, I managed to tag along to a local uni Q, um, and claim claiming to be straight, and that kind of got me through high school. So, um, I'm really excited to hear that there's a QS a at my old school. Um, and I think that the QS a network has the opportunity to really revolutionise the environments that our, um, young people, um, are operating in at school and have a really positive impact on our suicide rates and mental health rates in the queer community. Um, yeah. So thank you. Hi. I'm I'm Jim. Um, I was interested to hear that you You you work in early in early years teaching. Um, I. I was I've just been thoroughly outed by my great nephew at It's a It's an interesting experience. Um, I nobody did that to anybody when I attended my first in infant school as a child? I guess so. Things have have sort of changed. I think quite a lot. He had a he he very firmly before Kindy actually told me that I was a girl. Um, I think that I couldn't work out whether it was logic that he'd worked it out. Or somebody suggested, in fact, that I must be, um, highly unlikely. It It's, um it's been an interesting experience because obviously, um, it's quite obvious that in some respects that there's no reason why kids of that age should be prejudiced. Really? Um, I mean, because that's really not where their heads are at, I think, um, so, So that it's a It is a problem. I'm sure. Um, I haven't really tapped into any of the other parents that are going there. I'm only doing this well, possibly temporarily. I just filling in, you know? But he I got announced as Uncle Jim, basically who lives with Uncle Ian. Really? And that was it. I think it's sort of an interesting experience, really. Um, but I'm not sure where it's going to go. And I don't really know what the other parents feel. I've been taking up your point about the word gay. For instance, if he called me gay, um, then, um, it could well be that they have to translate. Or that, you know, I think they did suss me out. It wasn't gay because I was sort of awful. It was gay because I had a, you know, sexuality that was gay. Um, but so it's an interesting It's an interesting thing, really. Um, I suppose it would be all too obvious to suggest that doing stuff with early years kids could help an awful lot. Um, certainly, there's a mixture of, um, heritage in the kids that he's with. Um, there's a It's obviously a very welcoming environment for, um, people broadly, um, by and the teachers of different heritages as well, you know. So, um, it's obvious that, um, the only thing in the way is that we just don't wear it quite so forcefully in front. But kids make sure you do, Really? I mean, they there's spelling out of them. I think when it's, um when they're so young. I'm Nigel. Um, first of all, I'd like to thank you guys For all the support I've received up at Pompeo and what you've done. I echo what Kevin says in terms of changing it from the top down as well. Certainly what I've seen is amazing support from the kids for each other, you know? I mean, they've just been amazing to each other, straight kids, for queer kids. It's just been brilliant watching that support yet from an institutional sense in terms of actually where this prejudice comes from, it's being put on the kids from the top. It's not there. It's like Jim saying here these kids are not born prejudiced. It's something we do to them as a society, and I'm using that as a great big we, you know, in terms of society. And that's what needs to change. And I think it's really important. Certainly I see, you know, like of all the teachers that I work with, so many are supportive and so many are terrified to say anything. There's a real atmosphere there of being well, you lose your job well, they're right, you know. But that fear is wrong. It's absolutely wrong and we need more openness in schools. We need more transparency and where the school is not prepared to do that. What we need to do is have a QS a in the area where those kids can go to in the interim until we can make the school do that. By that, I don't mean PD for the teachers, which generally can be a large waste of time because a lot of them are already very open to that. But the senior management teams tend to be so conservative, and so much of that spectrum of a much older New Zealand that just is not open to different cultures. And that's where we need to be working on those senior management teams and those principles. They need to realise that the world's turned. It's changed, and it's time to accept that and get on with it and celebrate it. Um, move ransom. I went to college, and it's in a little place called Levin. Um, I didn't have any trouble because when I mentioned to Mum that, um, they maybe wouldn't do the, um, whole kids and marriage thing. She thought that I'd get bashed. So, um, to reassure my mom and make sure that she didn't worry while I was at college. Um, all I did was make sure that those rugby eggs knew that I would punch their head. And if they, you know, gave me any grief, So I'm I'm a bit like muff as to, um I never saw it as a problem. So, um, if you if you have the energy of not like taking any homophobic shit, then I don't think it happens as bad because they know, you know, it's an unacceptable, um, kind of thing. Um, yeah, but it's it's what? Um, my name's Andrew. And, uh, there's just a couple of things I want to note on here. Um, I'm from Dunedin and I went to John McGlashen College. So on one hand, I can also understand where moves coming from, where in some places there's an attitude that sort of you've got to sort of stand up or physical violence. But in a lot of ways, I also see that as being completely not OK and I'm really glad there are systems like the Q SAS that allow these Children and youth to group together as a community. Um, the two things I want to note on here was one that I've just finished a preliminary study of Q SAS and schools dealing with these issues that, uh, even though it was only preliminary, found that there was a strong correlation between distance to, um support networks and Q SAS and the level of sort of homophobia that's seen inside the schools. Um, so that I'm looking forward to looking into further. And the second is that I was recently in in Dunedin and I was in a store talking with one of the staff members, and they casually use the word gay in conversation as a reference to Bad. And I had first walked away from this, uh, but then decided that I couldn't went back and confronted them about this and the response I got. Well, the one that I was expecting was one of basically being told to stuff off. Instead, the response I got was one that was very apologetic, very understanding. And then a conversation followed where we talked about this. Now, this young man had just finished high school, had just left King's high school, which is also very conservative and also was a, um, young Maori youth And what outstanding me there was in Dunedin where the attitude was you had to be a hard man, especially, um, and please excuse any stereotypes, but especially in a very white place like Dunedin, where Maori and Pacific Island youth aren't allowed to show any sort of acceptance of other students that aren't sort of your typical rugby players. It was just so great to see this complete attitude shift. So I would encourage you guys to use this opportunity and with all the stuff that's happening around the campaign to find that break into the South Island and use this chance to build on it. Hi there. My name is Chris. I once survived five years at Napi Boys High School, and my overriding memory of that time is just complete alienation and isolation and not say. And this when you talked about this, um, taping off the mouth that I just so relate to that because that's exactly how it was. I was never bullied. I was never. But I was completely silent. And, um and I suppose my life has just been a slow process of pulling that tape off my mouth, and it continues to the stove. So I really congratulate you guys. It's fantastic. I'm Margaret Ma and I'm sorry. I was a little bit late coming into the session, and and one of the reasons I was late is that I was talking to somebody who is still being somebody in their fifties who's being persecuted because, um, of the by by conservative Christians and so I I would think it is so important, um, to get the message that you're getting out to young people. Um, you know, I went to Craighead Diocesan School in Timaru in the seventies. Um, and that was it. It was being a girl, Um, and thinking you might be gay, which should cross my mind at the time, though, it took me a long time to kind of come to terms with it. It was much easier, I think, because, you know, girls can have really close friendships and hug and hold hands. And, you know, and we all you know, you can have girl crushes on head prefects and all that sort of stuff. That's completely fine. It was then, um but now I have an association with Queen Margaret College as as, um, Presbyterian minister at Saint Andrews. And I was on their board for six years and I think, um I think church schools are still an area, um that needs, you know, to be addressed and to be encouraged. And one of the, um and I think, you know, by having an out lesbian on their board and involvement in leading worship for the school, that was sort of a good message that they sent even though they weren't really particularly overt about that. But I know that the girls who needed to know knew And, um, I was really thrilled when I went to speak to the school's out group a few couple of years ago. And there are these girls in Queen Margaret uniforms and, um yeah, so I. I think it's really important that that suggestion that somebody made that there would be sort of off campus places for people to go as well, and so that they can network and, you know, and I. I think the issues are still huge for people in provinces and rural areas and really support whatever you can do in that area. Cool. Ok, thank you, everyone. Um, maybe if there's any final questions or comments or anything No. OK, cool. Thank you all so much. feel free to come up and talk to us about anything that's come up for you. Um and Yeah. Remember our Facebook thing? Um, yeah. Stay in contact. Let let people know that we exist because we are new. And it's really important to kind of get the word out there. Especially, um, to people working or studying in schools. Um, yeah. Thank you for listening. And having us here agree. Thank. The audio recording ends. A list of keywords/tags describing the recording follow. These tags contain the correct spellings of names and places which may have been incorrectly spelt earlier in the document. 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The original recording can be heard at this website https://www.pridenz.com/marriage_equality_conference_qsa.html. The master recording is also archived at the Alexander Turnbull Library in Wellington, New Zealand.  For more details visit their website https://tiaki.natlib.govt.nz/#details=ecatalogue.1089374. Please note that this document may contain errors or omissions - you should always refer back to the original recording to confirm content.