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When Otters go wild...

Wed 12 Dec 2007 In: True Stories View at Wayback View at NDHA

Scotty D Otters – either an amphibious (or in some case aquatic) carnivorous mammal, or slim hairy gay men, from a subset of the bear community – are known to have a habit of escaping and letting loose! Last June my otter compatriot of the carnivorous type Jin (although both are known to be very fond of meat!) escaped Auckland Zoo for a generous three months and explored the North Shore. I, on the other hand, managed to partially escape the Zoo that is Auckland for a measly four days as I explored what exotic wildlife the rest of the country had to offer. Thursday 6th December – Sleep count – my usual 7 hours I escape the concrete jungle through a 5-hour drive to my home town of New Plymouth which is made exceptionally exciting by having to dodge crazy Auckland drivers who are also heading south to for an audience with one of the ultimate gay icons, Sir Elton John! Arriving at the New Plymouth's Bowl of Brooklands, things don't look pleasant. It's 6pm, wet and cold with a wicked wind tearing up the bank. The crowd is clad in plastic and tarpaulins, and copious amounts of alcohol are being brought at exorbitant prices from the approved in concert vendors. Allegedly it was so cold I started turning blue. At this point I was regretting not smuggling my hipflask full of scotch into the event. A rainbow for Elton 8.30pm finally comes while the crowd of 10,000+'s teeth are chattering away and Elton wanders out onto the stage. It was amazing - as he launched into song the rain died down, and to the left of the stage two rainbows appeared and behind us was a stunning Taranaki sunset. The whole show was just him and his piano, no accompaniment, and very few visual effects on the two screens next to the stage. Yet Elton and his piano was enough to captivate the massive crowd for three hours. Elton sang all the favourites, as well as introducing and singing both 'the ballad for the boy in red shoes' which was written about the HIV/AIDS crisis in America during the 1980's and lack of response by the Reagan Administration, and 'Roy Rogers' to which he described going to the movies on Saturday morning when he was a boy and falling in love with the cowboy on the screen. Also, candles were passed out before he sang 'Candle in the Wind' but the majority were extinguished multiple times by the bitingly cold wind. By the end of the show my hands were like ice and I could barely move my fingers enough to text but it was completely amazing. At midnight after a quick coffee I jumped back in the car and heading back to Auckland and to work at 9am! Friday 7th December – Sleep count – 2 hours Back to the concrete jungle. 2 hours of sleep, 8 hours of work, three hours arranging my topless bar boys for the weekend, and then I was back behind the bar at Urge for another Friday night. Was great fun as usual, but encountered two tourists from Holland, one of them being a journalist for a gay publication over there. Now at Urge, we look after our foreign visitors very well (some of us look after them remarkably well!), and after I finished up at two I spend several hours showing them the sights and sounds of Auckland, including a trip to the top of One Tree Hill to look at the lights. Crawl home just before 7am on Saturday morning… Saturday 8th December – Sleep count – 2 hours again Started the day by nearly missing my flight - but my second weekend off in eight months is in motion and my big escape to Wellington has begun! The trip down was rather uneventful and the moment I arrive I'm bundled off to 'Arcadian Nights' by Philip Braithwaite, the graduation play of Ricky Beirao aka Rhubarb Rouge at the Wellington Performing Arts Centre. I must admit the play was fairly 'interesting', and my attention was helped along by some liquid assistance procured on the plane, but it was thoroughly enjoyable none-the-less! The Glamazons After stumbling out of the play, I headed to Imerst to watch the rehearsals for the Glamazons' Spice World Show – which was my primary incentive for heading down to Wellington. "Take a weekend off to come see the show" I was told! Incidentally, I found out I'd be assisting with the show… wearing nothing but my underwear. Enlightened to this, I very quickly sought out a particularly strong martini. I also ended up helping out front of house before I got my kit off. There were still opportunities to become severely inebriated and but overall I had a fantastic time. The Glamazons' Spice World show was their response to the Spice Girls' world reunion tour not coming to New Zealand. The event had been widely publicised and was mentioned on Breakfast on TV1 during the previous week. It was a fantastic tribute to the Spice Girls right from their starting years, through to Ginger Spice splitting away, and to their reunion. They even did the Pepsi commercial! They were fabulous as they always are (make sure you check out their music videos!). The crowd at Imerst were brilliant, and Neil and his crew on the door and behind the bar were awesome! La Toya Jacksin Apart from the amazing shows and atmosphere, two moments of the night were particularly memorable. The first was the boy, who been given Amyl for the first time, and decided to drink it. Several seconds later he'd emptied the contents of his stomach onto the footpath and turned green. He was fine, but I'd hate to have the burns he's got on his mouth and throat right now! Secondly, well that memory isn't particularly PG rated, but I'm definitely sending my love to the beautiful guy with the tattoos! Sunday 9th December – Sleep count – hmmm I don't think I've had any! Spent the day catching up with friends before I was escorted to the airport and sent back to the zoo. Was completely exhausted, but this is certainly one otter who can't wait to escape again!     Scottie D - 12th December 2007

Credit: Scottie D

First published: Wednesday, 12th December 2007 - 3:38pm

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