In writing my earlier piece on Marcel Jouhandeau, I noticed that ex-fundamentalist and former conservative Catholic lesbians and gay men have different ways of defumigating themselves from the destructive effects of conservative Christianities. How so? Well... It may be easier for the current generation of ex-fundamentalist lesbians and gays to escape the clutches of fundamentalism, given factors like the generally retarded development of fundamentalist 'higher education' in New Zealand society, which tends to be limited to baseline professional and trades education, such as those within private training institutions and one or two teachers colleges. Unlike the United States, New Zealand has no fundamentalist 'universities' of its own. Therefore, at some point in their lives, any previously closeted lesbian or gay man will find themselves in the fortunate position where tightly constricted fundamentalist social networks and ignorant church leadership cannot warp and distort their life opportunities and choices, even if it also takes time to free oneself wholly from the intellectual, aesthetic, social and emotional constrictions of a prior fundamentalist life. Happily, too, New Zealand is lousy at maintaining exgay groups- Exodus Auckland and the Living Waters Network of workshops are two contrary examples, but one consists mostly of older men, while the other is restricted to rural areas and provincial cities. Former conservative Catholics aren't so lucky. Fortunately, though, there is now enough diversity within Catholic social and political networks to provide alternatives for those who want to critically affirm what is good within Catholic tradition, and a self-affirming lesbian or gay identity. And, apart from Southland, and sectors of Auckland, Wellington and Christchurch, there has been no developed institutional or organisational base for conservative Catholic subcultural survival akin to those in Poland, France, Italy, the United States, Latin America and Australia. For that reason, former conservative Catholic gay men tend to be older, unable to form close emotional or social relationships with other gay men, feel threatened by critical inquiry, and are liabilities in any volunteer gay social service setting unless weeded out beforehand. For the conservative Catholic gay man, life goes as follows. They have sex, feel guilty, go to confession, get told that their sexual orientation is an 'objective moral disorder' according to the Vatican, although it would be nice if they could stay celibate. Cue existential conflict, self-reproach and other negativity when one does have gay sex again, feels guilty, goes to confession, and gets repeated negative reinforcement. How does one deal with this? Witness the outcomes of two lesbian classics. In Radclyffe Hall's The Well of Loneliness, Stephen Gordon is left to austere conservative Catholic butch self-renunciation and loneliness when she pushes away Mary, her femme lover, who 'isn't really' a lesbian [Tut tut - Ed]. In Jeanette Winterton's Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit, the autobiographical protagonist breaks away from her mum's creepy church and discovers lesbian love and relationships. And it all ended very happily for Jeanette Winterson herself, given her glittering literary career and consummate stylism. I think I know which ending I prefer... GayNZ.com News Staff - 6th September 2007
Credit: GayNZ.com News Staff
First published: Thursday, 6th September 2007 - 5:51pm