Alicia - South

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[00:00:00] This podcast is brought to you by pride in did.com with generous support from the rule foundation. [00:00:07] Tell me about how you describe your identity. [00:00:11] Fluid bisexual. What does it mean to just fish at different times I can be attracted to. So female is kind of new actually attracted to them at the same time, such as changes [00:00:27] detail, so having to explain to people [00:00:30] it's very much it's half consignor trying to explain 10 by six show, but they don't get that this different types, they just expect it to be the one [00:00:46] more about what you mean by that one type [00:00:48] of bicyclist. They expect that bisexual just means that you're attracted to both and I want I've got a lot is I think it's at the same time. So it's just generalized. [00:01:01] Have you found a lot of stereotypes or like them by phobia? [00:01:06] I've heard the usual kind of stuff like [00:01:12] this doesn't exist by sexualities, just so I chose that the whole thing you've got the How was that? And that you've known him? And Steve, I've heard that a lot throughout the churches that I've been to. [00:01:29] And then I [00:01:32] it's not what God wants. So different places, doing that with different kinds of stuff. Some churches have left because they've made me like, want to choose or. And that's kind of difficult. Because like, it's both big parts of my life. So I just choose both because I don't see why I have to choose. [00:02:03] Did you have to come back to people in your life? [00:02:07] Yeah, and most my friends know. I recently told my father's family they went over great. [00:02:16] They were completely fine with it. [00:02:19] So it was relatively Alright, coming out to my family. I came out to my friends. I've lost some. [00:02:28] But that's okay. [00:02:31] When did you come up? [00:02:33] A bit last year. [00:02:35] I came I I try coming up in a 16. But none of my family would believe me. So I just kind of went back in and for a few more days. [00:02:46] So yeah. [00:02:49] And what was that, like? Kind of, you know, like being in the closet? Like [00:02:56] I think it's just as horrible. It's just like, [00:03:01] kind of lying to yourself at same time. Because like you trying to be someone but at same time you're trying to fit into one else's idea of who you should be. So you can't it's just very suffocating. [00:03:19] played into it. [00:03:21] Yeah, the churches did have Lyft quite a few because of it. Because the last one I went to before the one I'm going to which is ensberg now was a huge one because it was the Mormon church. And they told me that the more the missionary told me that she was gay, too, but she's not getting any longer and I don't think you can stop being something I just think you can like yourself enough that you stop to believe it. So she said what's more important god are you pretty much yeah. thing by and I just left cuz I don't I'm not gonna stick around when I'm not wanted. [00:04:11] Did you were you at school when you saw to kind of become aware that you were bisexual? [00:04:15] Wow, something. I figured out something was that when I was 14, but I put it down to sing. I hung out with guys a lot. So I thought as you sing girls is how my friend swollen. But I figured out I came across a 10 by six show when I was 16. So it all kind of started a lot more into place. But I still trying to figure it out. Oh laughs at that point. [00:04:44] Was your school like a place where people were coming out or any like support and place for people who were? [00:04:52] I went to headway. There was not curious. It was a weird place open. Yeah. So yeah. Okay, I found out sensing lots of people actually had a suspicion. I was great. [00:05:06] And I didn't know so I can have been I must have been a bit. [00:05:13] So yeah. Yeah. [00:05:19] Christ it to Nelson communities are quite different places to go. [00:05:25] I think it's just not when I was at Headley, it was just one of those things that didn't really seem to be talked about at all. I made a video around it and he really came up. I think NASA is a lot more Pro, and it does come up and it's kind of like, it's not. It's not a taboo subject. So I think it was a lot easier up here. For me anyway. [00:05:47] Is it important to you to kind of have a sense of belonging and being part of the queer community [00:05:53] is a nice smile. [00:05:56] A lot easier. Because you're around people, you know, except for you. And there's no judgment whatsoever. And people just like you to be friends with you because of who you are. And it's not based on what you have or what you are. It's based on her. So that's probably pick one. How are you involved in the community? I'm just curious. Um, I've always seemed to be in a curious a sense Neyland minus when I was in Christchurch. So [00:06:33] yeah. Can you tell us what QSM means? [00:06:37] Christian, Chris Redlands, [00:06:39] in cases? [00:06:40] Yeah. [00:06:42] And how did you get involved in Keith? [00:06:45] officers involved in x and the internet things I found out about Keith when I was at Neyland, so instead of going in, and then when I came back up, I started coming back, [00:06:58] as he had any, like highlights being above and the cool things in particular, [00:07:03] everything. [00:07:04] I mean, [00:07:06] I love the hallways, but I just love it's one of my heart says away coming to QU. [00:07:15] He's a big part of the group, school gone on to quickly who he has made you [00:07:23] change [00:07:24] the way you feel about your identity, or [00:07:26] as a lot more comfortable with myself. I mean, I wasn't comfortable with myself fully into last year. So and now I just kind of go by the theory that if someone doesn't like me, based on my sexuality, they're quite narrow minded. And I really would rather not be hanging out with them anyway. [00:07:51] How do you feel about queer and trans representation in the media, these secret characters that you'd like to on TV on on the news, [00:08:01] I think it's great when you do see it. But I think there needs to be more of it. So it's more normalized. And I think there shouldn't be homophobia because me waiting on it, and other spaces or anything. I think it's just ignorance. And people just fear the unknown. And I just think it's silly, because we're no different from anyone else. And I think it just should be put out and more and be more positive. [00:08:33] Are there any TV shows or films or things like that you've really liked because of their portrayal of quick characters. [00:08:42] And we just use a few. [00:08:48] I have no idea off the top of my head, to be honest, but I've seen quite a few that I like, and the recent one I like that I watched was the bed house. And that was just Christ. And I was like a paper that was on trends that was right, all these different kinds of characters, all in one, movie and notices. And that was a lot of drag. And it was just a really good movie. [00:09:15] Do you say your, your identity like as a bicycle? And do you see that? [00:09:20] In characters at all in the media? [00:09:25] I find it easier to come across ones that are, I think, a lot more tricky to come across. I haven't come across as many as I have been as slightly as band. So track or whatnot. Right? I really haven't seen as much there. [00:09:44] What do you think about like Facebook and social media, as playing in Greece community and how we connect with each other. [00:09:54] Um, I think it's great, because then it's easier to connect with other people regardless of where they are, who you can relate to. And it's great for f2 something on like an event, it's easy to figure out where it is and what it is and stuff. So I think it's very handy. and attentive communication of getting in touch with people. [00:10:18] But issues do you reckon other kind of hard things to deal with for Korean people in New Zealand at the moment? [00:10:28] That's probably say, bullying, and homophobia and [00:10:34] just [00:10:36] like people not [00:10:39] living here but yourself. [00:10:42] Have you had much experience with? [00:10:45] bullying? Yes, but nine times out of [00:10:49] 10 of phobia? [00:10:54] What do you think that shows are going to be in the future for people changing, [00:11:00] things are changing, and they're getting better. But I don't think that the whole hundred everything's going to be cured overnight. I think it's going to take a while. Because you still have people, like especially parents, not necessarily accepting the kids because they are so own family members. So I think it's still going to take some time, but I think it is getting better. [00:11:25] What do you think about the marriage equality? And Bill passing recently? [00:11:29] I think that's great. I think if you love someone regardless of who it is, that what you do pretty much bang closed doors is your business and that I think it's great because you should be able to love whoever you love. It shouldn't be you shouldn't be told that you can't marry someone you love. I just think that's wrong. And [00:11:52] you're interested in getting married so kind of like him family that kind of thing? Yeah. [00:11:59] What do you kind of dreams like fans for the future? [00:12:06] jobs you're interested in things you want to study. [00:12:12] I, I'm gonna stand now some cuz my daughter and I'm and I just want to rise her quite very mind. And the job, actually I want to do is counselor and a counselor and an interest and at the moment and adults and GDPR day. So I'm trying to lay out what I want to do within the counseling. Awesome. [00:12:43] Do you find that being bisexual and having your daughter does it kind of change people's perceptions? Or does that make people assume things about you? [00:12:53] I think some people publishing stuff. [00:12:57] I don't really care. I'm just gonna My daughter is open minded. And because I don't want her being on the phobic. I just want her to know that people are people and you should. You shouldn't should should judge people based on how they treat you. [00:13:15] So yeah. [00:13:17] What about relationships you had especially like being bisexual has it? Been tricky? [00:13:26] I've had one girlfriend mostly went out with guys. I think it's more I find it easier with gosh know how to do it because like how to make a relationship work because I've always gone out with guys. I guess it's more fear of experimenting going out with a girl because I don't know what the ticket is. Pretty much. It makes me nervous. Yeah. [00:13:57] Do you think like when you have been named partner? How does it feel to to the other side of you to people ignore it to [00:14:07] count partner doesn't ignore it. Actually, he surprised me by when I first started dating him and he said Do you want a girlfriend as well? And it's not that he wants me to have one small He wants me to be happy. But I think it's just more complicated sometimes in my head because if I'm more attracted to a girl and more wanting being a girl, they don't really Mrs. At my head away but in the context of I'm dating the opposites he because it's just like, you love this person, but you're not attracted to them at all. [00:14:45] It's just so great. [00:14:49] To see lots of stereotypes about people in the queer community like what stereotypes Do you hear about? [00:14:59] Women by actually the [00:15:02] stereotypes i think is tons. I honestly wouldn't know where to start. It's there's so many stereotypes. I mean, this stereotype if you go to an old boys or girls college, that you're going to end up gay is a stereotype if you go to a Christian school, you're not going to end up queer it Oh, I think it's just a lot of stereotypes. So I think that stereotypes are just oh completely and utterly wrong. [00:15:35] Why do you think they come from [00:15:39] I guess when it comes to schools thinking that if you're around the same six that long enough you'll probably turn queer but I don't think you can literally turn queer I think you just say [00:15:52] I really cute stereotypes. [00:15:56] What other things in your life all parts of your identity important to the key adult another good outside of the quick [00:16:05] know, and then a separate go to outside is really like his career events on in the same place that I am, you know, God. But outside that it's not about [00:16:23] diff Fatiha because there aren't many people probably around your age and Nelson, who was a great defender. [00:16:31] Well, I'm the oldest one minus clear. Thank you. So I'd say it does make it a bit tricky, because there's not a lot of by people there in the ground. And it's just easier when you can get someone who can completely naturally relate on the same level. [00:16:50] differently. These [00:16:55] things progress small for people who were gay or lesbian, or bisexual people. [00:17:01] I think you hear and see a lot more stuff Meteor and other stuff about gay and his band they need to buy. It's not as much as I've come across it anyway. It's not really Sean or spoken as much about [00:17:21] how's your family reacted to you? And then bisexual? [00:17:25] Well, my mom's reaction was a sure about 50 times. My dad is I Oh, wow. Okay, sweet. [00:17:35] Because he knew he couldn't. It's not I can change it. And my father's family is so fine with it. They my father, he's fine with it. They think it's great. So, yeah, it's slightly mixed between my mom and my stepdad and my father and his family. [00:17:58] What do you know about the history of New Zealand's current trans community? [00:18:04] All I know about is that if you go back to when my mom was rap, yeah, is it wasn't accepted. It was a very subject that was hidden and it was illegal. I think that I don't really know that a lot of the history. [00:18:22] Where do you think we're going to be in [00:18:25] the future? [00:18:27] I hope this will just be it talked about subject and it might be to bear and they might be homophobia. And it won't just accept everybody has PayPal. So let's go back [00:18:41] and finish up. What's your favorite thing about being clear and bisexual? [00:18:46] being different, I guess. I think being myself and I think being able to have friends that are too and the community. [00:19:01] Sorry, yeah, it's quite cold. You teach me a lot of different people.

This page features computer generated text of the source audio - it is not a transcript. The Artificial Intelligence Text is provided to help users when searching for keywords or phrases. The text has not been manually checked for accuracy against the original audio and will contain many errors.