Stephen - Q12

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[00:00:00] This program is brought to you by pride in z.com. [00:00:05] We're here with Stephen. Hello. What gender do identify, [00:00:11] identify as gay or homosexual? That's sexuality. I mean, gender. Male. Okay, [00:00:19] then Yeah. What is your six year old? [00:00:22] homosexual dash gay? [00:00:24] Yes. I'm Wendy real, when did you realize [00:00:28] it wasn't really sort of a sudden, overnight thing, it was just kind of, you're aware of it. But it just, I didn't really classify it in terms of what society viewed it as I just viewed it as an attraction to men. And what I knew of gay, I thought to be something different, different coming from a slightly bigoted background. So I just assumed myself as male orientated as opposed to gay or homosexual. And so I sort of searched in that area a bit more to find out more about what the community was, rather than just to hearing one side of the story. [00:01:02] How Bry when you realize, [00:01:05] well, [00:01:05] I'm, well, I never think it was sort of an age sudden realization that was just more of a woman really that appealing to me in that particular kind of way. [00:01:16] In a way of voice No, no, what? Slightly? I suppose [00:01:19] you could say that. Yeah. How did you? How do you feel about you know, emotionally? I feel emotionally fine about it. The only problems I get, I just sort of find quite sad to the people who seem to help them. [00:01:35] Did you ever felt that you had to keep it a secret? [00:01:39] Well, I wasn't, you know, shouting it from the rooftops. I just kind of went along, being who I was. And if I felt comfortable telling the person that tell them if not, I wouldn't tell them. [00:01:53] So I'm not shouting, I'm saying, [00:01:54] yay, I'm gay. I think I've seen that in too many musical. [00:02:00] You came out of the closet? [00:02:03] I suppose. Yeah. [00:02:06] Well, front of the first person I came out to was one of my elders in a way. And we were just walking by a little cafe Bisciotti pulled me in and bought a bottle of champagne invited over all my other, you know, friends and everything, and we just sort of sat watching the sunset. Nice experience, sort of verbally set, but I think to everyone who knew me, it was never really a secret. [00:02:31] So people always assume that you were going away? [00:02:37] Well, voiceprint Well, European, okay. The special child. [00:02:45] I suppose you could say that. I think special was probably a little different. I mean, I don't feel any special with anyone else. I just think that I had more ability to express my thoughts and feelings to another person. How did [00:02:58] they react? [00:03:00] Cabrini tell told the people that you were okay. [00:03:03] Well, some people that was sort of great joy, sort of the virtualization realization of something that, you know, meant a bit about who I am and what it is, it has to be me. But at the same time, there were other people who just sort of felt intimidated by the sort of power that one has to sort of break away from something that known their whole life is sort of being sort of small ostracization in that kind of sense. But overall, I think it's been a really positive experience. I didn't imagine that could really be happier. [00:03:38] How did you feel from the reactions [00:03:44] shocked and disappointed, shocked at all the good ones for I didn't really see it that way until they set up and a little disappointed that the people who sort of didn't show such enthusiasm for I imagined that saying something like, you're gay, or you're homosexual, he like guys, or even you have a boyfriend shouldn't really, you know, be something so definitely, that means you can or can't socialize with them. [00:04:12] How do you present um, do you actually present yourself in a way that shows that you're gay? [00:04:19] I don't understand the question [00:04:20] being like, dude, like to try make yourself stand out as a six year old is it? [00:04:29] I don't intentionally though, I've been told that I can come across as quiet camp to some people and some people think I quite masculine, some. Not quite sure. If I do it subconsciously, if it's just being me, so it has different reactions to different people. I think it's all in sort of the eye of the beholder. [00:04:49] Okay, um, now we're going to go into more [00:04:52] personal questions. [00:04:54] This where I she need the bell? [00:04:58] Have you been no relationship before? [00:05:05] Yes, yes. How did you? [00:05:08] How do you reach other guys? [00:05:12] I don't really know. I just sort of meet people standing in queues or just through friends. People just talk to me all the time. It's quite odd. [00:05:22] Such the first, hey, I'm gay. And it [00:05:27] never starts off like that just oh, [00:05:28] no, no. [00:05:31] That's something I didn't expect? [00:05:34] Well, I'm normally quite open to it. You know, people, I mean, it just because you know, the next minute q or whatever, just, that doesn't sort of difference that differentiate us. We're both human beings. And I'm sure we both have a lot of life experience and interests, you know? [00:05:53] Did you have any support when you're coming out? [00:05:59] I had lots. I know, lots of people would have been supportive. But I sort of took a lot of pride and just being able to sort of show that I'm a strong enough person that I never really needed huge amounts of support, I just sort of came has essentially just kind of boils down to people, the people and you know, whether they held titles like parents, grandparents, doctors, psychologists, principals, you know, they're just people, no matter what age you are your person too. And you shouldn't be treated any Nick more negatively, or positively due to that facts. And because of that, when people have been negative, I never really seen that as too much of, you know, something upon. [00:06:42] Yeah, has it you been out? affected? Your relationships, your past relationships anyway? [00:06:50] Um, [00:06:53] I don't really think so. I mean, my, all my friends, so treat me the same. The only difference is, is I can I feel my you're able to make funny jokes like, I can't even drive straight. [00:07:08] How about intimate relationships? [00:07:14] I've always felt more nervous of introducing them to my life. [00:07:20] Mind to this I, [00:07:22] I think that if you do have negative relationships with family, that's always a burden that you're going this you out with someone that that's going to be put on them. And I think to certain extent, that probably has inhibited my relationships in some way. But at the same time, I'm very happy with all the relationships that I have had, have had. [00:07:43] How's your parents react to when you came out? [00:07:51] Oh, [00:07:55] my father was trying to find the most politically correct statement to sort of say, that's fine, it's great without seeing too happy, or too shocked at the same time, which is beautifully awkward. And knowing him like I do, I just kind of felt that in his way. That was his statement of approval, and he's happy for me, with some of my other family members, it's been a little bit more strenuous, but on the bright side, they're still sort of really care for who I am. And [00:08:28] I think it's [00:08:31] something nice to have, even if it isn't essential. [00:08:35] So do you take part in much [00:08:41] gay community activities? [00:08:46] I suppose I do. I do some part time volunteer work in the area. And I have gay friends to sort of go to events like the big gap coming up this weekend. But I don't really see us as going up to a sort of scenario I just see as a bunch of sort of friends in a way. I mean, we only really, really share one thing, when you get to know them, you sort of meet friends you share more or less with. [00:09:14] Okay, [00:09:14] there's a really personal question that always get [00:09:17] back for [00:09:19] your you're a virgin. [00:09:22] I can see why many people would consider that a personal question. [00:09:27] Well, I'm not religious. So I don't consider myself a virgin. [00:09:33] Okay. [00:09:36] Yes, no bells? [00:09:40] Have you gotten any abuse, because of your sexuality or your gender identity? [00:09:47] gender? Well, I suppose but [00:09:53] I find it a little difficult sometimes to see it as abuse, I think we all do. If it's a person close to us, we sort of associate them as a friend or guardian or something. And we sort of, because they are that to us to sort of give them special rights. But when you sort of have relationships with people like I do, where you are a person, if you're a bad person, I'm going to let you know that sort of things people can get away with, around you sort of become what you allow them to do yourself. And if it's just a crazy person on the street, I don't really consider that abuse much for as much as a kind of cry for attention for it so outrageous, you know, sort of verbally say something to anyone just because of you know, how they dress. So what even they associate with? [00:10:42] Why do you think you personally think why do you think that people abuse or gay bash or anything like that? [00:10:50] I think [00:10:50] part of it's probably the fact that they're not particularly altruistic individuals, or they don't necessarily think for themselves. And this is a little bit raise and that kind of culture, in a way, it's truly tragic that we sort of still have that kind of mentality with so many individuals, I think the pair of you sort of raises their child and instills that in them is truly wicked. And by the time you're 30, you really, the issues of being raised shouldn't really be that much of an issue for you anymore. [00:11:20] Can you tell me a bit more about yourself? [00:11:23] What do you want to know anything? [00:11:25] This this year, like an insight of who you are? [00:11:31] As a person a bit old fashioned? [00:11:35] You say [00:11:35] that an English accent? [00:11:38] I didn't think I could pull up in Hixson, I tried. [00:11:44] Your interest, sir. What do you do for work? Do you study extension residuals [00:11:49] I studied last year started working this year, I sort of feel as though when you working to something and working towards your own goals, something really deeply satisfying about sort of reaching a goal you set for yourself. And I always set them to far beyond what I think I can achieve. Some was never industry surprising myself or ending up in someplace completely unrelated to were meant to be in the first place. It's quite fantastic. Really. [00:12:15] How about your interest? [00:12:18] I really like the arts, you know, cooking and music and stuff. But I don't particularly seek them out so much as just find them. [00:12:28] I'd like to thank you for having this interview with me. [00:12:33] Is there any other comments that you would like to make? [00:12:36] I think I just like to say that anyone who happens to feel sort of pressured, or you know, and any sort of strain that you know, [00:12:46] in almost any circumstance, depending on your age, you can get some type of assistance with whatever negativity you are dealing with. And no one, no parents, no one at all, has any right to abuse you whatsoever. And that goes beyond physical violence, but too emotional as well. So being you know, slags in the streets, or be having things thrown at you or feeling unsafe, or uncertain in your environment is not okay. And no matter what age, if you are in some type of abuse, that is some assistance for you. And I hope and that way, it does get better. I also just sort of think it's quite valuable to say that if a person does feel some sort of negativity towards what they've been born as Jews or anything, I mean, other than the fact that it's unjust, and hopefully will be altered with time is that when it comes to sort of, if you happen to like something, but you don't want to get involved with it, because it's, I'm not sure, because you feel it's strange or stereotypical or associate you as part of what you would associate with or even if you're not homosexual, and you want to do something, but you don't want to do it for it seems like then people would assume that other than the question that I've asked, why would that matter? I find that ever since I have come out, in one sense, I felt a lot more comfortable doing a lot of different things like musicals, you know. [00:14:25] And stuff like that just which had been never saw before, because of the view people have of people doing that. [00:14:34] And just because you're [00:14:36] different from other people doesn't mean that you are promiscuous in any way or acting. It just means that you know, you're more active. [00:14:47] Thank you for that and you're welcome.

This page features computer generated text of the source audio - it is not a transcript. The Artificial Intelligence Text is provided to help users when searching for keywords or phrases. The text has not been manually checked for accuracy against the original audio and will contain many errors.