Alexandra - Q12
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[00:00:00] This podcast is brought to you by pride and dead and rainbow [00:00:05] Hello How are you today? [00:00:07] I am great. Great. [00:00:10] How are you? [00:00:11] Oh Sondra, that's good you got to know that you're not [00:00:16] Can you tell us a little bit about yourself? [00:00:18] Oh whoa what am I to say? [00:00:22] Well I love music and I love [00:00:27] biology [00:00:34] random [00:00:43] I just like five years anyway um yeah I guess I like food haha [00:00:56] time to shine [00:00:59] well views on like people's sexuality [00:01:04] tell us a little bit about yourself [00:01:05] myself Okay, um well I guess I and my last year I had no idea what I'm going to do next year but just get a job or something in the meantime [00:01:23] What music do you like? [00:01:25] I like all kinds of music I'm not really one to judge anything I'm more like a peacenik it's it's everything can help people out when they need it. Yeah, [00:01:35] he went to the precise last week No, [00:01:39] I this was actually my first time here but I've been meaning to come here for a long time just [00:01:47] never got around to it because I had periods restrictions before but now I live at home so I can go out if I want to. Yeah. [00:01:55] So what is your 6am [00:01:58] ago? Yeah, I go. Yeah. If I say ginger, I didn't see your girls. Well, [00:02:04] no, actually, surprisingly, I kind of switched between both sexes depending on my mood and also depending on who I am was like, what I feel comfortable is being so around my friend color be a complete tomboy and will do same things and then around, learn to be really hyper and guilty, but also sometimes a tomboy. Yeah. expression is how I feel I am maybe [00:02:35] like, a masculine tomboy. [00:02:38] Well, even though I ever go and love being a girl, I actually have that mythical vibe about me because I just like it. [00:02:46] You feel like you want to be a male sometimes? [00:02:49] A used to. But now I've just kind of accepted that. It doesn't. Doesn't really matter. But yeah, I used to I really, I used to be a joke about being interested. There's a guy he was a kid, you know. But now I personally don't really care. What I come off is, you know, [00:03:09] what is your six year old? [00:03:10] I am by so greedy. [00:03:19] Some people call it greedy. I call it I just say Well, I'm not I'm not going to judge people by you know, the six in you know, the physical six inch. You know, I'm all I judge people by who they are. And I just am on this. So I don't really notice the six. Yeah, I'm really, I guess it comes off with a really exciting part of me. But yeah. [00:03:46] I have a scar. scar. Yes. [00:03:51] I mean, you get baby shots, when you're a baby. Will they give you like you shots just to help start you so you don't get second alpha beta young and your nieces base. I knew I had a bad reaction to my shot and my ex monthly that said, let's just carry on with your trauma. And well, when light is mostly that, what three days old so then essentially puts with me without it was three days old? [00:04:20] My parents friend at the time, she really wanted to scratch my face. But my parents said no, because you will hurt her. And you know, being an infant and having really vulnerable skin, it's going to you know, do something. And it's exactly what I did. And she scratched my face. And I got a really scary idea. It says it's just fades Scott and brown. And I used to get ridiculed for growing up. And I was not the popular one growing up at primary, I was more like the one everyone picked on because of us. And I felt they really said because it was [00:04:59] you know, it wasn't something I could control. But it's just the ignorance of children. [00:05:03] They want to scratch [00:05:04] your face. Cuz I heard it. I was trying to scratch but so she probably wanted to scratch it to make me feel better. But really, she just made it worse. Yeah, yeah. [00:05:17] So when did you realize that you were by? I [00:05:20] think I realized [00:05:24] quite early on. I mean, I always had a thing for girls that I just develop my you know, thing for guys and chill right up to high school. Yeah. And so I thought maybe I was lesbian, because I love skills. And I still do a typical guy when it comes to a good looking guilt, like, I'm not like, classic classic guilt or anything. But yeah, you just can't ignore it. But then then I realized I'm by Dream High School, I think that I was by many, because my friends around me also by an old, really acceptable thing in our group and I loved it, you know, you don't have to, like hide the side of me. So I just thought in the end, I'm just gonna be me. You know, and I'm just going to accept it. You can't control it. And you know, don't don't feel like bad about it or anything. I mean, it's just who you are. I mean, you might not like it but yeah, better be who you are they trying to be something you're [00:06:22] not. How did you feel when you realize? [00:06:26] Actually, I wasn't I was kind of a bit upsetting because my mom doesn't like buys because she finds a screen that's probably where I was at the function. She doesn't mean she doesn't mind lesbians or gays. But when it comes to buy she just thinks you're greedy and you can't make up your mind and you'll be stupid. So I was [00:06:48] really reluctant to really know [00:06:51] But father was always accepting and he always knew it wasn't me so you go [00:06:55] put a voice order that your pen sexual [00:06:59] Yeah. [00:07:01] big words with mom she's not gonna do [00:07:06] anything it's just all what what Mama told me [00:07:11] Well, what do you close biological father really like things to do? things other to do then with like, things that she's great with? Like teaching and everything like that? She's not going to understand it. Yeah. Yeah. [00:07:24] So heavy. So you did you ever went for a long period when you realize that your body [00:07:34] actually, I because I hit the floor. I've been educated for so long. I actually went through a denial stage where I didn't like guys. Yeah. And [00:07:52] I was born this way and I refuse to take guys [00:08:01] growing up, you know always thinking skills and always expecting it and stuff. And guys, the idea of being a little guy kind of scared me so I was really reluctant to you know, accept that. But eventually I did. [00:08:17] So I'm actually really Okay, now. [00:08:20] You're You're okay around guys. Oh, I mean, you've always been around okay. [00:08:26] I grew up around guys because of a tomboy. Yeah. And I was like skills and when I had girlfriends is weeks kind of in like, overly friendly. So some I was used to it but when it comes to like see guy other than afraid was new. Yeah. [00:08:49] Oh my God. He's hot. [00:08:55] Not really look, sit Make me like someone that's who they are. And let's rewind leans towards friends as because [00:09:02] that sounds white pain, sexual, then. Yeah, [00:09:04] well, actually, maybe this passage, just to sort of, but by just so people don't get confused. I know exactly what I'm on. [00:09:13] A bicycle was more about a physical attraction between two genders very apparent sexual is more about [00:09:21] your feelings for a full person as a personality. [00:09:25] Okay, so pen. [00:09:28] I have not been [00:09:30] very open. [00:09:34] Anything I see my [00:09:36] next my next question. [00:09:42] Yes, yeah, [00:09:42] definitely. Definitely was out. Since [00:09:51] you know, you know, yeah, it's close to say, I just need to be one. I. So what happened? Who did you help us, I told my friends, they always know what so it wasn't really anything new to them. But telling classmates, they kind of like, you know, got a bit stupid over it. But eventually, they just like, Now, that doesn't bother. I love it. Because the people that I'm around and really accepting. And also the people that I'm around now are even more accepting or even part of it themselves. So especially [00:10:20] if you're going to, like, cost space. [00:10:22] Well, I always mean to be to go because you know, just to see everyone else's views and stuff. I mean, I find it really easy. I'm not going to like, you know, classify anyone. It's just who you are. Everything. [00:10:35] Everybody has something in common. [00:10:37] Klay awesome. You know, and you know, you should be proud of it. Because it's better to be proud than to be ashamed. Because a shame you can get the proud. You feel proud. You just happy. [00:10:49] When you [00:10:50] came, you came up to your parents came out? Oh, it wasn't a very happy thing to come out with my parents because I'm, well, Dan was simple and easy. He always knew it. And so and also have been sleeping, he's got, you know, [00:11:11] he's got a guy on call. So he's used to wear and he accepts that. And he doesn't see anything wrong with it. And he just says, Be careful, because people can hear you. But other than that, he's just really well, welcome that. I think everybody. [00:11:25] And that [00:11:26] case, I think that's what that's the case for everybody. [00:11:29] I think that what made me really happy about her, proving that he really didn't see that if I don't you ever see a boy [00:11:35] or a girl in the room? [00:11:39] a boy or a girl in your room, [00:11:41] Alex, or Gil? classify the guilt, you know, [00:11:45] really pointed [00:11:46] out? I don't think it was either he was expecting it. But he knew and he was gills. So you know, [00:11:55] Mom, when we actually had a real big argument, and that's when I started like, you know what I like girls more than like, it was when I was guys's days, but I did actually like girls Morning guys before I came to the point where I just takes it and [00:12:10] just spreads it out at her and then just stormed off and dead, you know, didn't like how I told her, you know, kind of told her in a more mature way. And not just out of it. Because obviously it would have been a shock for her to she didn't know. I mean, you know, she'll, you know, you see a lot of people was Thomas when she was a tomboy growing up. And so she didn't think anything different of it, [00:12:32] as you probably thinks that you're the perfect. [00:12:35] Not the perfect child. [00:12:37] Actually, I'm considered the most rebellious child in the family. But that's only because I'm the most honest child in the family. I mean, the only reason why other people in the family are considered rebellious is because they're quiet they lie they, you know, you know, don't be honest, but I'm just honest. And I like being honest. And so obviously, honestly keeps you Hello. [00:13:02] Everyone, y'all know friends Kirby out of have a support system that Yeah, [00:13:05] we had a great support system. I mean, my friend, college, she, she's my best friend, my best friend growing up, she was always she actually had a denial stage with me to going through when she don't like guys. Like the idea of having guys. And actually, she only now has finally accepted it, and actually go through Skype boyfriend. [00:13:32] Boyfriend really, because I don't really think your friends and you know, maybe it was just she was scared as well. [00:13:40] There's been some new strange. [00:13:48] I mean, I will go for that. [00:13:52] And also, I had another friend who is not my friend anymore, because she decided to really hurt me like not physically, but you know, messing around with friends in it and giving me an Title I don't deserve because I've never done it. And so yeah, but she's also one. And so she was really accepting as well. I mean, she would work for it as well, it [00:14:14] would bit more lean towards being at least being straight. I guess that's maybe some maybe it's kind of a thing for girls to be either really proud of, or proud to be different, or I don't know, it's just yeah. And so it was really exciting. And also, I've got someone in there, Lauren, who is also she's, she's deciding, still just curious, unknown, she's studying on her own sexuality and deciding on what she likes. So like, [00:14:48] biocurious [00:14:51] she's also deciding what agenda so she's not actually really short anything, because at the moment, she's not really keen on anything at the moment. So we'll just figure it out. [00:15:03] You find relationships before? [00:15:06] A lot of guild relationships. And [00:15:10] while they were really, [00:15:14] really stupid when it came to go relationships, I didn't take them seriously. But [00:15:19] yeah, things [00:15:21] like, you know, friends and accepting and I guess I don't really take it seriously. I mean, I don't take it seriously. But also I'll jump in I did all that. So a lot of your relationships and one boyfriend couple years ago, and I stopped with guys innocence and the because we may not for nine months that he decided to blow me off because he wanted to. Because after I built up, you know, his confidence and everything can make him feel good about himself and built up his social life and everything he's despite now, I don't need you anymore. [00:15:54] This is probably the reason why we through that denial stage. Because it really had. Yeah, and [00:16:02] trying to get emotional over all this stuff. But yeah, it really hurt. And [00:16:08] I finally, I didn't think anyone seen nobody since then. And only recently well not really recently more like during the whole beginning of this year. And from pre war in the school last year, I got really close with my friend My who is now my boyfriend Biden. And yeah, [00:16:28] and he's just, I hope, will now that I'm more mature and you know, more serious on relationships, I don't want to blow it off over stupidity or Yeah, not take it seriously. Cuz [00:16:43] you know, there's no point in that. What's the point of going out with someone if you're not going to stick with them? kind of thing. So I hope we lost in Yeah. [00:16:52] How do you meet other people in the gay community or LGBT community? [00:16:56] I think it was really? Um, how do I meet them? Yeah. How do I just like, how did they out with it with me? [00:17:05] And I just meet everyone I'm [00:17:07] that attracted to you? Like sexually attractive? attractive, like, [00:17:13] well, I'm social. If I even even if I like, quiet shade, everything. I talked to everyone and anyone because I'm nice. And I like make sure someone's okay. I mean, I'm bit nice. And well, because I'm so open about my sexuality, I guess it maybe gives them a cue to be I can be comfortable around this person. I can tell them, you know, so it says probably how was? [00:17:38] What is your definition of virginity? [00:17:42] Well, my definition is probably different from a lot of people, because I got mine stolen twice. So I guess the definition of insanity is where [00:17:57] I always thought it was you know, that first time? You know, not for the first time, but if you haven't stolen, then maybe you can, you know, consider first time when you actually willing to give it away? That's what I think reclaiming it. Yeah. I mean, it's sad that you don't have it. I mean, it hurts that I didn't have mine. But when you're really honestly willing to give it away, you want to give it away, you know, and you feel ready to give it away, ready to let it go. That's what I think is the definition of not not for the fact that you've actually done it. Ellis was actually your first time and you didn't really want to give it away then. Yeah, that's my definition. Really? [00:18:38] Have you been abuse or received any abusive behavior because of your sexuality? [00:18:45] Um, I did for a couple every now and then I'll get the odd person that goes stupid. And it's just by sheer ignorance and arrogance. Yeah, we're they would insult me for it and insult my friends for it because that was a total. And I will just don't signal them because they just don't know. And, you know, really, honestly feel sorry for them. Because if they're going to be rude enough to do that, and obviously they're just, they're unhappy with themselves or trying to put up a wall where they are something that they're not, you know, and maybe it is displayed arrogance, you know, I don't want anything to do with that kind of thing. Just see own view. So I don't really take it to heart when I get excited about it because they just don't know. Yeah. [00:19:31] Well, thank you for the interview. [00:19:33] I know welcome
This page features computer generated text of the source audio - it is not a transcript. The Artificial Intelligence Text is provided to help users when searching for keywords or phrases. The text has not been manually checked for accuracy against the original audio and will contain many errors.